Short jokes

Short jokes

Side

Have you heard of the man who got all his left side chopped off?

He was all right.

Sex

Konan was having sex on the couch, thinking how he'd come so far.

Dog

What do you call a dog without legs?

Nothing, it won't come either way.

Kid

Have you ever met a kid who’s so fat that they can’t even be accepted to “My 600lb Life”? They need a higher-ranking one!

Doctor

I talked to your doctor. He said you wasn’t going to make it because your stretch marks look like pieces of bacon.

Ryan

You should watch Ryan ToysReview because he's not mean; he's a very nice boy.

9mm

How do Americans learn the metric system?

9mm at a time. The problem is sometimes it goes straight through their heads.

Stereotype

Why is the Rubik’s cube record holder always American?

Because Americans are really good at separating colors.

Man

What do you call a man with no arms or legs being pulled by a boat?

Skip.

Police

Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?)

It’s the police, ma’am, your son got hit by a drunken driver. He’s dead.