Short jokes
When red do be sus, though.
EVERYONE:
"My boyfriend, Danny, broke up with me. Can some hot guy come, so I can interview them and see if they wanna date me?"
Why do birds fly upside down over Poland?
There's nothing worth shitting on.
Your mom is so fat, she played bowling with the planets.
What do squirrels eat at the fair? A-corn dog.
Why are you sitting down to pee? I don't have a good back and can't lift something big.
"Among Us" tea water.
Huh what you say?
Come fight me, suck a dick.
You're adopted, that's why your mom or dad never came back with the milk!
The reason I love Stephen Hawking is because they roll off the tongue so nicely.
Q: Why don’t orphans have a personality?
A: They don’t have a person in reality!
I said to the orphan, "Do you want me to take you to your family? Oh wait..."
Me: You know your parents were very good people.
Orphan: Wow, I didn’t know that.
Me: I know, you're an orphan.
A butt saw the toilet and said, "Shit, I'm sick!"
My wife saw me hit the best drive yesterday with my golf clubs.
I must have drove that chihuahua 300 yards.
I love telling good news to my patients, like they survived the crash but their family died.
What kind of knickers is the best?
Windy knickers, because they're the best kind.
Little Red Riding Hood says to the wolf: "What a big dick you have!"
Wolf: "The better to f*** you with!"
This is Riley abortion clinic. Yesterday's loss is today's sauce.
"Hey, is that a peach?"
*gets slapped on the butt*
"Noted."