What are Russia's favorite netball positions?
Goal Shooter and Wing Attack.
Me: Hey, that's a really heavy bag, do you have a lot of books and magazines in there?
The Quiet Kid: Yeah, magazines.....
So, as a school shooter, I try to remember my ABC's. A, B, C, D, E, F, GUN!
And I basically stop at G, since no students ever speak to me about the rest.
Why did the school shooter earn extra points?
Because he was on a kill streak.
What a school shooter's favorite song?
"Pumped Up Kicks."
When the school shooter enters the classroom and it's the quiet kid's dad.
When you're in the middle of a test and you hear gun shots.
Obesity kills thousands of times more Americans than shooting does, which teaches us an important lesson:
Shooters do poorly given the size of their targets.
Hey, I just want to give a round of applause to Shooter McFly, single-handedly keeping the jokes section alive. Unappreciated, well, Shooter, one person here appreciates you, at least.
What do a school shooter and a person with gum have in common?
One's the pull it out everyone wants to be their friend.
What’s the worst thing about being suicidal?
The school shooter will always spare you.
What do Priests and School shooters have in common?
They both blast little kids in the face.
I don’t like to tell school shooter jokes because they are usually aimed at a younger audience.
There will be no school shooter joke today in honor of the 10 people killed in the Colorado grocery store shooting. R.I.P.
Who wants me to bring back the daily School Shooter Jokes?
Teachers: Whenever there’s a school shooting, hide under the desk.
Students: Hiding under desk.
Shooter: Well, no one’s in here!
When you are sleeping in class and the shooter sees you, then they wake you up and say, "Let’s team up," like, what the f*ck?
What do you call a white kid at the back of class?
A school shooter.
The school shooter encounters the emo kid. He reaches for his gun, but the emo kid disappears. He then finds that his gun is not on him.
True fact: School shooters aren’t dangerous to you if you're the school shooter.
