Shooter jokes
When you’re playing dead and the school shooter starts unbuckling his belt and you hear him say, “This boy always had a fat ass.”
How do you stop a school shooter from killing you?
Tell him you don’t believe in dog.
When you're banging the class slut and the school shooter says to leave his corpses alone.
What do you call an orphan with a gun?
(No) home shooter.
When the school shooter throws a smoke bomb into the classroom, and the autistic kid thinks it's a dance party.
Michelle Obama wanted more vegetables in school.
When you hide in the girl's bathroom so the school shooter won't go in there: 😃
When you notice that the school shooter is female: 😟
This isn't a joke, just an American back-to-school list.
1. Pencils
2. Binders
3. Paper
4. Pencil sharpener.
What, did you think I was going to make a school shooter joke?
When the quiet kid has an argument with the school shooter, and you didn't get to pull out the AK.
What's the similarity between pedophiles and school shooters?
They both shoot when they see kids.
When the school shooter finds you under the table,
"Wonderful weather we're having!"
When you let the school shooter borrow your pen so he doesn't kill you.
Obesity kills thousands of times more Americans than shooting does, which teaches us an important lesson:
Shooters do poorly given the size of their targets.
The school shooter points the gun at the emo kid. While the shooter tries to shoot him, the emo kid dodges the bullets like in the Matrix and takes the gun away from the shooter and shoots himself.
What’s the worst thing about being suicidal?
The school shooter will always spare you.
The quiet kid, orphan, and school shooter walked into a bar, and he ordered a beer.
What a school shooter's favorite song?
"Pumped Up Kicks."
If a school shooter walks into a classroom and shoots an autistic kid, what does the kid say? "Why do I look like Swiss cheese?"
There will be no school shooter joke today in honor of the 10 people killed in the Colorado grocery store shooting. R.I.P.
When the school shooter is gonna clap the football team but his AK jams: “Take it easy guys, I was just joking!”
Teachers: Whenever there’s a school shooting, hide under the desk.
Students: Hiding under desk.
Shooter: Well, no one’s in here!