A blind woman told her husband someone is coming. He asks how do you know, you can't see. She replies, "I can taste it."
Your mom is so ugly her face would split in half when she sees you.
My friend is so ugly, she got surgery twice, but not even that could fix her.
Yo mama's so fat, she thinks the buffet is the starter plate.
I went on a date with an Eastern European chick. She got mad because I rushed her...
Get it? It's Russia, and I rushed her.
I know a little girl who once had an accident. When I asked her what her favorite song was, she responded with "š¶Head, shoulders, wheels, and frame! Wheels and frame!š¶"
Your momma so fat, when she asked for a water bed, she got a concrete bed.
Q. Why did the cow cross the road?
A. Because he/she wanted to watch the moooovie.
A delivery service called āRoss Deliveriesā was known to be the best in town. They never got anything wrong. One day, Rachelle got a delivery, but when it arrived, it was all broken! How is this possible?
I never said which delivery service she used. Lol.
Bitch: Nice eyebrows.
Me: Yeah, where's yours, motherfucker?
Bitch: (Realizing she shaved them off cause she thought it would look cool)
Did you hear about the nurse who couldnāt swim?
She ended up under the doc[tor].
Your momma's so fat, when she asked for a water bed, they put a blanket over the ocean.
Aliana is so fat, she can't fit through a hula hoop.
Your mamma's so stinky that perfume leaks where she puts it on.
Yo mama so fat, when she takes an elevator, it ALWAYS goes down!
Yo mama so stupid, she couldn't comment on this website because she didn't know the 2x4 check!
Yo mama is so fat that every step she takes in the ocean creates a tsunami!
Yo mama so fat, a bus ran into her and she said, "WHO THREW THAT TWINKIE AT ME?!"
Yo momma so fat she died at 5. Her kids, f
* * *
Yo mama is so hairy that she brushed it like her hair and put pins on it.
