Shes jokes

I asked my wife to embrace her mistakes.

She gave me a hug.

Yo mama so fat that she walked in front of the TV, and I missed a whole episode of iCarly.

I saw a fat woman at the bus stop today, so I asked her, "When's it due?"

She replied, "I'm not fucking pregnant, you rude prick!"

I said, "I meant the bus, you fat cunt!"

Your momma is so stupid, she farted and turned the radio on to cover up the smell.

Yo mama so stupid, she stared at a bottle of orange juice for 12 hours because it said "concentrate."

Your mum is so overdue on eBay for £2 so she could get a male stripper.

The emo girl in my class did her photosynthesis project on a tree. Little did she know that would be her demise later on.

Yo mama so stupid,

she thought DUNKIN' DONUTS was a basketball team.

Why is it okay for a woman to use me when she feels like it, but when I use her body when I feel like it, I am the bad guy?

Yo momma's so ugly that when she walked into a Haunted Mansion, she walked back out with a job application.

Yo momma's so fat, when she bought a fur coat, all animals went extinct.

Yo mama so stupid, she bought a solar powered flashlight.

My grandma walked up on my doorstep and I grabbed my bible... I thought she was a smurf...

The other day my wife told me to pass her her lipstick, but I accidently passed her a glue stick... she still isn't talking to me.

Yo mama so fat that when she landed on the moon, instead of saying "One small step for man kind," she said, "One small step for world domination!"

Yo mama so dumb, she asked how much a free sample was.

Yo mama's so fat that every time she goes on an elevator, it goes down.

The only thing funnier than the shooting of that healthcare CEO is imagining the look on his wife's face when she got the hospital bill.

Remember back in the day when your TV wouldn't work so you'd bang it a few times?

I tried that with my dishwasher, but unfortunately, she ended up pregnant...

My sister is so stupid, she thought LBJ was Spanish for blowjob.