Self Harm jokes
My friend told me my wrist wasn't a cutting board. So I asked her if hers was at all, and if I could borrow it.
Wow, didn't know little Jhony jokes were so dark. Well, but what do you expect from a site with jokes about suicide, sex, and drugs? :-)
"Drugs?????" His eyes popped out. Well, I don't really know if there actually are-- and the exact ones... But there's so many kinds of jokes-- even chin jokes. :^))
And slice jokes!
What kind of "slices"?
Handy ones. ^_^
I was in cooking class and my teacher said, "Does anyone know what a chopping board is similar to?"
Me and my friend just glanced at each other and burst out laughing.
Long story short, the teacher understood the joke, and now we are both in daily therapy. šš
I started debating whether or not suicide is a good option. Self-harm just hasnāt been cutting it lately.
To whoever you are, you are loved.
My parents were concerned when I said I like to bleed, but at least I cut my risk of cancer and stroke in half.
Why is emo grass better than normal grass?
Emo grass is gonna cut themself.
What do emos like to do when they're sad?
They play violin on their wrists.
Bros got barcode arms.
Iām becoming a litter bit more zebra everyday.
An emo and a leaf fall out of a tree. Which hits the ground first? The leaf. The rope stopped the emo.
My pencil sharpener when I bleed:
And I don't really care how bad it hurts. Cause you broke me first.
Did you hear about that new emo pizza? It cuts itself!
Why do cats leave scratches on arms? They don't; I do it myself.
I told someone some jokes, y'know? "Fruit Ninja," "barcode legs," "French puppet thigh wrings." And she was like saying that's not cool and stuff. So she reported me, and it was like:
The counselor: "So I've heard you've been making sh jokes?" Me: "You say it like it's a bad thing." Her: "It is." Me: "Chill bro, it ain't that deep. Don't worry I'll end it :)"
The match: "Ur my match." The thighs: "You light me up."
What's flat chested and emo? A cutting board.
I love you like my cuts.
Deeply.
Why do emos love the winter? Because of the long sleeves.
when you don't have a phone to play Fruit Ninja and improvise.
You know how in Pinocchio the French puppets have the thigh rings?
Well, I got them too! Only red and thinner.