What is a self-harm person's favorite game?
Fruit Ninja.
Butcher knives are great tools for cutting many things!
Fruit, vegetables, my arms.
I can hear thunder outside, which I find weird since the lightning is on my arm...
Why don’t emo girls go to self checkout?
Because every time they scan, it scans twice.
What do you call a flat emo?
A cutting board.
My wrists have a different texture pack than the rest of me.
I'm gonna jump to my death.
Don't worry. I won't jump far.
Just off this chair here...
Did you hear of the guy who was sad about being in a wheelchair? He had that crippling depression.
When me and my friend went to the market, my friend tried to scan my arm, and I asked her what she was doing. She answered, "Oh, I had to buy you so I don't steal you."
What did the emo kid say to the cashier? ... "Scan my wrists."
My friend, you lit my mind: that's what the lighter said to my thighs.
Are you bleach? Because I want you inside of me.
People see this Rolex and they kill themselves.
Motherfucker, that's a suicide watch!
My arms are just a different texture pack compared to my body.
What do you call a flat emo kid?
A cutting board.
Why do self-harmers "draw" on their arms?
Because everything they do is in vein.
Punchline: "Vain" sounds similar to "Vein".
Two emos are dating, and the most romantic thing they have ever done is slit each other's wrists.
My 14 year old daughter went shopping at a grocery story.
She gets to the register and she asked the cashier to scan her scarred wrist.
The cashier scanned it and replied with, "Ma'am this item is worthless."
My friend, while we are shopping and I'm telling her about my mental illness: "You're priceless."
When we get to the checkout: "I'm actually $2.50."
My best friend looked at my arms and said, "Stop, sh*t, it's bad," then turns right around and says, "You look like a tiger."
So from here on out I am now Finn, the self-harming tiger.
