Season

Season Jokes

Family Tree

Q: What season can an orphan see their family tree?

A: Fall.

If you don't get it, in the fall trees have no leaves, there [are] just empty branches, like an orphan's tree.

Mistletoe

"I wish I was either Christmas lights or a mistletoe."

"Why?"

"Because I want to hang!"

Emo

What falls first, the emo or the leaf? The leaf. The emo was hanging.

Santa

You know why Santa's saying is "Ho Ho Ho?"

How else is he supposed to give boys and girls a baby brother or sister for Christmas?

Santa

What does Santa say for the toys to go to bed?

"Time to hit the sack!"

Leaf

Why do leaves change color in the fall?

Because they want to leaf their old color.

Ornament

To start off this Christmas season, I'ma make a list of what I want, then I'ma make plans with my family, then to start off my decorations, I'ma start with the first ornament and hang myself.

Food

"Hey, I heard you were a bit down—where's John?"

"He died."

"Oh, I'm so sorry, but I got you food."

(After they eat) "Hey, how did John taste seasoned and cooked?"

Quote

Quote of the day:

Just one small positive thought in the morning can change your whole day.

[Comment your favorite fall beverage!]

Winter

Someone said to me when it was winter it[’]s time for you to “chill out.” I was like 👁👄👁

Mama

Yo mama so fat, when she walked in the room, we missed three seasons of our show!