School Jokes

i was happy to find i could get a passing grade in all my subjecks if i had sex with my teacher untill i rememberd im home schooled

when i get home from school i always lay on my floor crying and wishing i was deid.

a student was peeking in on a 10/10 chick and the guy was about to nut. the school shooter patted his back and told him to leave his corpses alone

The teacher asked the class to use the word “fascinate” in a sentence

Molly put up her hand and said, “My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating."

The teacher said, “That was good, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate,’ not 'fascinating'.”

Sally raised her hand. She said, “My family went to see Rock City and I was fascinated.”

The teacher said, “Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate’.”

Little Johnny raised his hand, but the teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word “fascinate,” so she called on him.

Johnny said, “My aunt Carolyn has a sweater with ten buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasten eight!”

The teacher sat down and cried.

tech administrator of a school: hm, a message from google security? tech administrator of a school: OH SHIT! assistant: WHAT, WHAT, TELL ME? tech administrator of a school: WEVE BEEN COMPROMISED, WE FORGOT TO SECURE THE SITE! assistant: OK, OK, THE KEY IS NOT TO PANIC... let's call the school board

A FEW MOMENTS LATER

head of school board: HAHAHAHAHAHA! that's a good one, almost as good as the one with jack, jill, and the ripped condom! HAHAHAHAHAHA tech administrator of a school: HAHAHA yeah I know right *whispers* you are playing it cool, right? head of school board: *whispers* yeah were fucked...

TWO HOURS LATER

important fat people in one room: OH FUCK OH NO, HELP PLEASE!!!!! WAIT, HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO TELL THE PARENTS ABOUT THEIR STOLEN INFORMATION!!!

AND SO THAT WAS THE BIRTH OF RIOTING TEACHER

the columbine high school basketball team hasnt been the same since they lost there 2 best shooters

How do pedophiles follow the law?

They drive it slow in the school zone.

why are americans so dumb?

because they shoot the ones that go to school

Q: why are school shooting jokes funny

A: because their intended for a young audience.

You: Bro, this school picture is soooo ugly!! (Points to yours) Me: Bruh, you just typed up mirror!

In Denver, the members of a Sunday-school class were asked to set down their favorite biblical truths. One youngster laboriously printed: “Do one to others as others do one to you.” —Lee Olson, The Denver Post

If a homeschooled kid shoots his parents, does that count as a school shooting?

So as a school shooter, I try to remember my abc's. A, B, C, D, E, F, GUN! And I basically stop at G, since no students ever speaks to me about the rest.

A young boy walked up to his dad and asked. "Daddy why are you banned from coming to elementary school?", The dad calmly replies. "Because that's how I met your mother.".

A class is being taught when Bill Clinton walks in. He asks the class, " What is a tragedy?" One kid, named Jim, raises his hand and says, "if my family and I got ran over by a truck, that would be a tragedy." Bill Clinton replies, "That would be an accident, not a tragedy." A couple of seconds later, Audrey raises her hand and says, "If a school shooting would happen and 10 kids died, that would be a tragedy." Bill Clinton replies once again with: "That would be a great loss, not a tragedy." All of the kids are confused now when all of a sudden Matthew says "If you and Hillary Clinton were on an airplane and it got blown up, that would be a tragedy!" "Yes!" Says Bill Clinton "How do you know?" Matthew says happily, "It is definitely not an accident, and certainly not a great loss!"

What’s the worst thing about being suicidal? The school shooter will always spare you.

I drove through a school zone and found out you can drag a speedbump 😬

Does anyone know what's going on with all the creeps that joined and restart your school laptop to get everything unblocked

*P.O.V orphan wanting to go on school trip/camp* Teacher: “can I have ur parents signature? It isn’t filled out.” Orphan: “um yeah.... That’s gonna be hard....” Teacher: “why?” Orphan: “I just have to find them first....”