School jokes
Updated - Grad 2020 Commencement Groupings.
Updated - Grad 2020 Commencement Schedule.pdf
Dear Grad Parents, Please pass the attached Commencement schedule on to your graduate(s). We ask that students arrive 15 minutes prior to their scheduled time and that they do not arrive early. Staff will greet the students outside the main entrance. Students may wear cap and gowns and/or formal wear. There will be more information to follow in the coming days. Thank you.
(Shared from the "Wolves E-genda" app.)
What's a witch's favorite subject?
Where do math teachers go on vacation? Times Square.
True story: In 1986, in the midst of the HIV epidemic, they made condoms available to the public. At that time, me and my boyfriend were 13 years old. My boyfriend was so happy: "These will make great water balloons!" And I was even happier. I did not have to pack a lunch for school tomorrow, lol.
What do you say when Jack's late to sex ed?
"Aye-jack-you-late!"
What do birds use to check their grades?
Air-ies...
Why did the rapper go to school?
To drop some KNOWLEDGE BARS!
Why is there a middle school?
Because the kids that go there are middle class families.
Mom: Son, get up for school.
Son: I AM UP *holds up books and says I'm up* IM UP MOM!
Me going to the principal's after telling the kid with a wheelchair to stand up for himself.
At school I am always called emo.
Little did they know that emos are wannabe goths.
Once at school, a teacher thought I was Russian. Why do you think that? I said. The teacher replied, because you're reading from Right to Left.
Why can't orphans go on field trips?
They don't have anybody to sign the form.
What time is it when you walk out to the school?
Time to go to school!
Pro lifers: End abortion!!!
Pro lifers after school shooting: But not this abortion.
What do you call a high school student?
Alone and depressed.
1. Full name: John.
2. Proverb: work is not a rabbit, does not run.
3. Favorite meal: the sphinx with the sour cream.
4. Sexual orientation: sexually disorientated.
5. Mental health: mentally retarded.
6. Previous careers: funeral undertaking, after that two years in the circus as the main brown bear, after that in the church school for two years, after this experience five years as a screw in the jail for the worst criminals with the top degree of supervision and now working for the secret services in my home country after gaining the top-secret audit.
7. Favorite pets: dog, bumble bee named Maxo, a butterfly named Redwing and the lizard named Notail.
8. Favorite activities: washing the dishes, cutting the woods, vacuuming and playing hard rock.
9. Working motivation: none.
I hope that you will accept my curriculum vitae and that we will see each other soon already as new colleagues, I wish more or less. Kind regards, John.
Why can't you run with a pencil in the hallway? Because too many people got killed!
Why can an orphan not do school work?
Because they have to take their work home to their parents.
Me: What are we doing in HPE?
Friend: Fitness.
Me: Fitting deez nuts in your mouth.