School jokes
What's yellow all over and can't swim?
A school bus full of children.
The teacher told me to put my MP3 away, so I brought out my MP5. Now that bitch knows what not to tell me.
Where are people sent to die?
Ross Hall academy.
In our history class we were on our China unit and learning a little about gunpowder.
And I said "WOAH THAT'S LIT!"
My teacher told me to have a good day. SOOOOOOOOOO I went home :)
Roses are red, violets are not, everyone at Grant High School is probably a thot.
One time this kid came back from school and said, "Mom I have one good news and one bad news, which one do you wanna hear first?" And his mom said, "Good news please," and the boy said, "I got 100% on my math test today." and his mom gave him a hug, and the boy said, "Now to the bad news, I LIED!"
Teacher: Take a seat, class.
Wheelchair person: I've been in the seat.
Why did the M&M go to school?
It wanted to be a Smartie.
Me: I bombed the 2 tests yesterday.
Friend: What were the tests about?
Me: Japan.
Son - Dad, I've been expelled from school for having sex with a girl in my class.
Dad - Son, that's the 2nd school this year! Maybe teaching isn't for you!
Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven eight(ate) nine.
"Brandon, tell the teacher that I'm with Ms. Polack."
My first high-school football game was a lot like my first time having sex...
I was bloody and sore at the end, but at least my dad came.
Teacher: What’s 2+2?
Jimmy: 2+2=feEesh
Teacher: Well, Jimmy I can see you're going places, not college, but places.
Why do midgets need a lot of books at school?
So they can reach the top of the desk.
Commander: "Fire a warning shot."
Soldier: "Sir, this is a M32 grenade launcher."
Commander: "Potato, potato, just fire."
Soldier: *fires M32 grenade launcher near a pre-school*
Commander: "They're trying to run, TAKE THEM DOWN!"
I got rejected from art school today, so yeah.
The son margarine shows his father his test that he failed.
Father: Son, you can do butter!
I was sitting in math class, and our teacher doesn't like it if we don't work on math in his class. So, I did science homework on top of a math book.