What did the cow say to the farmer? Moo away!
Say Jokes
When you're driving past a graveyard say: "Wow, people were just dying to get in there."
A man walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "What, no soap?" Then he dies and she marries the barber.
I was watching a TV show where a guy was hanging off a cliff, then the series ended... I guess you can say that they left that guy on a cliffhanger!
What did the no head man say?
"Haha!"
What did the cake say to the fork?
"Do you want a piece of me!!!"
What did my dad say before he went to go get milk?
"There's money in my wallet for pizza. I love you."
My friend says, "Time flies when having fun," so when he was gaming, I threw his clock to test that theory.
What does Stephen Hawking say after sex? That was wheely good.
Say what you will of pedophiles, but you can't ignore their problem with immature ejaculation.
A mom and her son are taking a walk when they pass a homeless man fapping. The boy asks, "What is that man doing?" The mom says, "Making pizza," trying to turn him away.
The son sees a dog fucking another dog and he asks the same thing. She says, "Making extra cheese." When they pass a window and see a couple doing it, he asks the same thing. She says, "Ordering the pizza."
Later that day, the mother says to the father, "I think I want to order some pizza with extra cheese tonight, don't know why that sounds good."
So that night, the husband who was watching tv yelled up the stairs, "Wanna order some pizza!?"
The mother replied, "DON'T WORRY I'M MAKING SOME!"
The son's voice followed, "I'M ADDING EXTRA CHEESE!"
What do butts say?
"Help me, I'm getting wiped clean!"
What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? "I gagged."
What did one ballsack say to another?
"You stay here, I'll go pee."
What did the math book say to the other math book?
Wanna hear my problems?
What did the daddy bullet say to his son when he missed the bull and hit something brown and gross?
"That is bull crap!"
What did the father bullet say to the baby bullet when he killed a bull by hitting it in the eye: "Bull's eye!"
So a girl says to her ex, "I can't get you out of my mind, the boyfriend I knew." The girl replies, "I see you in everything, like when I'm walking down the street, even at work, like trash cans are everywhere."
A man walks into a bar and orders 3 shots of whiskey. The bartender asks, "What's got you down?"
The man says, "I just found out my niece is gay." The next day, he orders 4 shots of whiskey. The bartender asks, "What's got you down now?" The man says, "I just found out my son is gay."
The next day, he orders 6 shots of whiskey. The bartender says, "Got anybody who likes women?" The man says, "My wife does."
My sister got mad when I told her to say this word 10 times, and she got in trouble, and it was a funny word that she did not even know what she was saying, ahhahaha! 😆 lol