Runner jokes
The umpire and the catcher were having a conversation. The runner slid into home, “I slid into this conversation.”
One time I tried running to home, but I forgot I don't have one, so I stayed at third.
A pedophile and a priest run a race.
You can’t beat yourself in a race!
It looks like a runner bean, only smaller.
From the makers of Mangeone...
Imagine if a disabled person's last name was Runner or Walker! 😬😂
What do you call a kid with Down syndrome trying to beat Minecraft?
“A sped runner.”
What’s something you can say during a pregnancy test and during a sporting event?
"We’ve got a runner!"
Who were the fastest runners ever? Adam and Eve. They were first in the human race.
What do you call Mexicans running down a hill?
Sandstorm.
What's got 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves! Nah, just kidding... He still hasn't unwrapped his present.
Who did a barber win a race?
He knew a short cut.
What can an Olympic runner do that Hitler can't?
Finish a race.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite food?
Runner beans.
What is speedrunner's favorite type of food? FAST FOOD!
What mountain do runners race on?
Mount Rushmore.
I was watching the London Marathon one year, and I saw two runners in costumes. One of them was dressed a chicken and the other dressed as an egg. I thought: "This'll be interesting."
What is the difference between runners and my car?
My car is still running.
I was gonna stop for the cops, but I ran because I was high (the song don't copyright me plz).
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
Iron jug.
I was doing a 10km run with my good friend Pessi. As we were setting up our smart watches, the watch voice asked us if we wanted to do a solo run or a group run.
Pessi proceeded to smash both our watches and shout, “I don’t want solo run, I want Penalty!”
Shame on you, Pessi!
I really wasn't planning on going for a run today, but damn, those cops came out of nowhere!