Rubber

Rubber Jokes

i went to the pharmacy the other day. i tried to buy a pack of condoms but i pretended i didnt have enough money to mess with the cashier. i went back into the aisles of the store got a pack of rubber bands and plastic wrap bought them and walked out. i loved the look on the casheirs face when they saw my decision.

How is having fun with a prostitute like bungee jumping?

You’re dead if the rubber breaks.

crazy I was crazy once, they put me in a room with rubber rats. Rats make me crazy. Crazy I was crazy once...

Guy goes into the gas station says I need a box of rubbers with pesticide. The cashier said pesticide don't you mean spermicide? The guy says no! My old lady has had a bug up her ass all week and I am going to kill it.

A penguin and a polar bear are sitting in a bathtub. The penguin asks the polar bear,"hey, can you pass the soap?" The polar bear obliges. A few moments later, the penguin asks,"hey, can you pass the scrubber?" The polar bear does. Shortly after that, the penguin says,"hey, can you pass the rubber ducky."

The polar bear, beginning to become upset, turns to the penguin and says,"What do you think I am? a radio?!?"

What do a bungee jump and a hooker have in common? They’re both cheap, fast, and if the rubber breaks, you’re pretty much screwed.

What's the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms? Ones a good year and ones a great year

Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson has made a laudable, command decision to omit real firearms from his movie sets. This being the case, he ought to produce, direct and star in his next movie titled: “The Rubber Gun Squad.” 👌 😉

The popular girl told me "I bet your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory!" Two weeks later, She shows up pregnant.

... I guess her rubber broke too

when you have to get your prostate checked and you can feel the cold rubber of the glove but you realize both the doctor's hands are on your shoulders