Road jokes
A robber robbed a bank and ran into the road and got hit by a car.
The cops said to him, "That's CARma for you!"
Your hairline goes so far back that cars on a highway don't know which way to turn.
Why did the emo kid cross the road? To get a box of tissues!
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
Because he was part of the Lazy Bones team!
Why did the cow cross the road?
To go to the moovies.
Did you hear about Alicia's car accident?
She was really drunk and all over the road until she was all over the road.
Why did Anakin Skywalker cross the road?
To get to the dark side.
A man is driving down the road and runs over a rabbit. He slams on his brakes, gets out, and walks up to the flattened bunny. The bunny is obviously expired.
A passing car slams on its brakes and screeches to a halt. The driver of that car runs up to the bunny, pulls out an aerosol can, and sprays the bunny with the aerosol spray. The bunny jumps up, runs a few feet, then stops, turns around, and waves its paw at the two men. Runs away a few more feet, stops, turns around, and waves at the two men. Runs away a few more feet, stops, turns around, and waves at the two men. He continues to do this until he’s out of sight.
The first driver looks at the man with the aerosol can and says, “Wow, that is amazing! What is in that can?” The man looks at the can and reads the label, “Hair restorer, with a permanent wave.”
What's the difference between my car and a hooker? I park my car in a garage instead of leaving it on the side of the road.
Why did the chicken cross the road why? Because they wanted to kick someone in the family.
How did Helen Keller drive?
One hand on the wheel, one hand on the road.
Why did the pillow cross the road?
To get to a mattress store!
I had to stop drinking because I got tired of waking up in my car, driving 90.
Why did Anakin Skywalker cross the road?
To get the milk and to get to the dark side.
Why did the Dinosaur cross the road?
'Cause the Chicken wasn't born yet.
Why did the toilet paper cross the road?
It was on a roll.
Why did the dog cross the road?
To get to the other side.
What is the road on a hill?
Hillside.
In the realm of words, I shall embark, To craft a verse, both bold and stark, Thomas Bulgin, a name that ignites, A tale of length and moist delights.
Free from the chains of structured rhyme, I wander through this realm, sublime, Thomas Bulgin, a phrase so strange, Evoking thoughts that rearrange.
Long, it stretches, like a winding road, Leading us to depths, yet to be bestowed, In syllables, it dances and it plays, A journey we embark, in myriad ways.
Moist, a word that teems with life, A touch of nature, amidst the strife, It whispers of raindrops on tender leaves, Of dew-kissed petals and gentle heaves.
Thomas Bulgin, a phrase so surreal, Unleashing emotions, that time cannot seal, In this short verse, I strive to convey, A glimpse of what these words might say.
So let us ponder, the mystery untold, Of Thomas Bulgin, both long and bold, For in the realm of poetry's sweet embrace, Even the unusual finds its rightful place.
What do you say to a one-legged hitchhiker?
Hop in.