Did you hear about the mad who got his whole left side cut off - He's all right now
you cat to be kitten me right meow
Hey girl are you an orphan? Oh that’s right I’m your daddy.
A woman once didn't return home for the night and the next morning when she arrived home her husband started questioning her about where has she been. She lied saying she slept at one of her friends. The man proceeded to call all her friends all of which denied her sleeping at them the previous night.
Meanwhile, somewhere else, a man didn't return home to his wife for the night either. The following morning his wife started questioning him and he lied saying he slept at a friend. She proceeded to call all his friends. All of them said that he indeed slept at them the previous night and one of them even insisted that he's still there, but he's using the bathroom and he can't talk right now!
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
A man walks into a sky scraper bar and takes a shot of tequila and jumps out of a window. An on looker watch’s this and is scared but what scared him most is when the same man who jumped cane back up a gain 10 minutes later. The onlooker who is amazed asked the man how he was still alive and the man said with a drunk slurred voice I “I don’t know every time I take a shot and jump I float right before I hit the ground!” The man demonstrates and as he said floated down and and came back up to the bar. The onlooker says that he must try slams a shot of tequila and jumps SPLAT! The bartender looks at the first man and says”Your and a-hole when your drunk Superman.”
tyler m is not to be sitting in the chair he is right now
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
grandma: calls you: hello grandma what are you doing why you can’t mean I’m right in the house right now grandma: I didn’t mean To call you bye
5 people went to a store the ask for a menu”the waitress said”I will be right back.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
to RANDYYYY,
hi randy this is ALYA i dont want. to fight with you if your an orphan and you do know about your past you probably get sad right? well these jokes just bring up the bad times up for me.
-ALYA with love
why didn't the pirate right a letter to his mom
R u kidding me??!?!
White on white crime l, well ham rights crime anyway in Eastern Europe right now!
You want an insult? Right, look at the mirror
thiers gonna be 8 planets right after i destroy uranus
When it comes to bears, of course they always give bear hugs, well what do you call them when they arn't hugging right?
Just barely hugging you! lol
We say “Father, I have sinned”, because it would be weird if we said “Daddy, I have sinned” right?“Forgive me Daddy for my transgressions!” We say the “Our Father”, not the “Our Daddy”
Dad\mom:Son,your adopted .son:i know,.*holds up daddys phone that has the text of them talking about it.* dad:babe,we need to talk. mom:ok...... dad:hes grounded. mom:your right,your grounded! oh and im dumping you. son:am i getting a new daddy? mom:soon honey,soon.... dad:i really shouldnt have let her know i cheating
