Right jokes

A proud father has six children. He always calls his wife "mother of six" to her displeasure.

One night at a party, he yells across the room, "Mom of six, we're going now." She replies: "I'll be right there, father of four."

What’s the best part of fucking Noor’s vulva (btw Noor is black)? If my dick is right beside Mara’s vulva (btw Mara’s white and so am I).

Me: What has two legs and bleeds?

Friend: Um, women? Obviously?

Me: Actually, half a dog. So you're still right.

It's easy to tell if a skeleton is lying to you because you can see right through them.

Every depressed person just has to say, "I WANT TO JUMP OFF THAT TALL BUILDING RIGHT THERE!" and then points to the building and runs up to it like an immature child, and then they get disappointed when they aren't allowed into the building.

What’s the difference between a gun and liberals?

Guns only have one trigger.

When cops say you have the right to remain silent,

You're just happy you have the right to do something.

What is the worst thing about dating a blind woman?

Getting her husband's voice just right.

All countries will get Covid.

Except China, they got it right off the bat.

Q: What did the kid on the airplane say?

A: "Those are two nice towers right there."

What do you call it when a man named Ned works at Panera Bread?

Panera Ned.

I'm on a roll with my jokes, right now!

If 7 8 9 why was ten scared?

It was right in the middle of 9/11.

They say mistakes make you stronger. If that were true, then whoever made that nonexistent thing called “women's rights” would have muscles bigger than a white girl.

I named my cousin's parrot Michell, and then I started to call Mikey "Mikey", right? I'm starting to teach my cousin Sammy how to say "Mikey Mikey" and he says "mekiy meiky" 😆

Why is a brick always hard? Because he seen the brick that was getting laid right next to him.

What can you hold in your left hand but not in your right?

Answer: Your right elbow.

Hi my sweet friends! This is for everyone who needs help right now :)

Yo mama so fat that when she was on the moon, she had it sent right into the abyss of outer space.

Last night I shared a bed with two of my friends because we were in a small hotel. We had strange dreams last night.

My friend on the left dreamed of getting a handjob.

So did my friend on the right.

I had a dream of skiing.

It looks like Kevin Magnussen finally got pole position.

He has the bragging rights that he took over Russia now.