Question jokes
I got mad at my white friend today. I, as a darker person, had told them to meet me outside at 3 o'clock. They, being VERY special that day, had said, "AM or PM?"
Laughing at their question, I said, "Honey, 3 AM, because I'll lose a fight at 3 PM."
An Asian student was learning logarithm in class. He wrote down his name after the question. The teacher asked why. He replied, "My class ID is number 1."
Mom asks, "Who are you talking to?"
The child said, "A mistake."
I saw a kid crying yesterday, and I asked him, "Where are your parents?" Then he started crying harder.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Spell.
Spell who?
W. H. O.
Police: Where do you live?
Me: With my parents.
Police: Where do your parents live?
Me: With me.
Police: Where do you all live?
Me: Together.
Police: Where is your house?
Me: Next to my neighbor.
Police: Where is your neighbor’s house?
Me: If I tell you, you won’t believe me.
Police: Tell me.
Me: Next to my house.
My mom and dad: KIDS COME DOWNSTAIRS TO EAT! Me: What's for dinner? Mom and Dad: Food.
The next day KIDS COME DOWNSTAIRS FOR FOOD! My brother and sister: What's for dinner? Me: Food ;-;
A young girl was playing in the park with her mother when she asked the question, "Mummy, what's that building over there?" The mother looked at the prison, smiled, and said, "That's where the cotton pickers live."
Wood fired pizza?
How's pizza gonna pay child support now?! :O
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How long are you? I
Q) What did the airplane say to the little boy?
A) Nothing, airplanes don't talk!
What's the difference between an anal and oral thermometer?
The taste.
What's white and annoying at breakfast? An avalanche.
Why did little Suzy fall off the swing? She got hit by an axe.
Why did little Billy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.
How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.
A common question I get as a doctor is, do vaccines cause autism? Well!, I was vaccinated, so.....
Can you drive a pizza? Of course, as long as you change the olive oil.
What do you call a pun that's bad? A bad pun.
A woman approached me in the street the other day with one of those charity collection buckets and asked me: Do you know how often people die from AIDS?
I said: Now I'm no expert, but I think it's only once.
Q. What's an aborted baby's favourite type of humor? A. ...
Someone asked me my gender... I said, "Woah, man."
Who sucked on my cock?
Answer: You.