Pussy jokes
Q: What do the mob and pussy have in common?
A: One slip of the tongue and you're in deep shit.
Asian pregnancy test:
Stick a Rubix cube into pussy.
Wait 30 seconds, if it's solved then there's a little Asian in there.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
My I.
May I who?
May I put this pussy on your mouth?
I got up one day; my neighbor was in my house and was going to take me and my mom out. I showed my mom and my neighbor a trick. They both liked it. I asked my neighbor, "Do you know any tricks?" He said, "Yes, in matter of fact, I could tell you what your mom had for breakfast." I said, "How?" Well, my neighbor licked my mom's ass and ate her pussy out in front of me. He told me my mom had pancakes. So we were in the car; I asked my neighbor, "How did you know what my mom had pancakes for breakfast?" My neighbor said, "Well, that is what your mom made me while we were waiting for you to get up."
My man is a pussy cunt that sucks my dick.
Joke's on him, he just asked me for bobs and vegana.
Why should a feminist never join the United Auto Workers, UAW?
Because the only thing that a feminist would do in the United Auto Workers, UAW is lick pussy all day in the woman's restroom.
Kenny is a comfort snacker.
Every time he's stressed, he eats his mom's pussy.
Roses or daisies? Now I know what flowers to put on your casket when I murder that pussy.
pussi
Where do gorillas get all the "pussy" from? The strip club, which is called "Poker Kong Night."
Oh, fuckshit, bitch, damn cocksucker.
Pussy, asshole, cunt.
Mother fuckin' dirty whore, shat onto my lunch.
Pisscunt, damn bitch, suck my dick.
Jesus Harold Christ!
Shit bitch, cocksucker, Goddamn motherfucker, pussy, asshole cunt!
If two feminazis are carpet munchers, which one in the lesbian relationship cooks?
They both don't because both of the carpet munchers are too busy eating each other's pussy 😋 🤪 😌 😏 😜 👍 👍 👌 👌 👏 🏆 🥇 💭 🤔 😮 😁 😊 😃 😄 👌 😍 🥰 ☺️
Shipmate: Captain, there’s an iceberg and we need to steer around it right now!
Captain: My momma didn’t raise no pussy. Either that iceberg is gonna move or I am.
I wanted to fuck my mom, but she replied, "My pussy only belongs to your dad." That's why I had to fuck her in the a$$!
What do you do after you eat the softest pussy in the world?
Put the diapers back on.
Little Johnny is watching his dad shave one morning, and his dad was making a lot of mistakes. Suddenly, his dad screams, "Bitches and asses!" Johnny asks what it meant, and his dad replied, "Aunts and uncles." Oh.
Next thing he hears is, “Dicks and pussies!” Johnny asks, "What's that mean?" To which his dad replied, "Uh, coats and hats." Oh. Next thing he knows, he sees his dad jumping around the bathroom yelling, "Fucking, fuck, fuck, FUCK!" "What does that mean, Dad?" And his dad yells, "Cut Johnny, it means cut!!!" Oh.
Next week is Thanksgiving, and the doorbell rings. Johnny answers it and says, "Hey, bitches and asses, hang your dicks and pussies here, Dad's in the kitchen fucking the turkey."
Alle Kinder heißen Rune, außer einer Pussy.
Little Johnny brings his cat to school, and then the teacher asked him why. Little Johnny says, "Because I heard my dad tell my mom I'm going to eat that pussy up when the kids leave!"
"Your pussy is sweeter than Mom's," Brother admired his sister.
"I know," replied Sister. "Father told me too."
My mom told me that her doctor told her personally that she had to keep herself isolated because she has a few new symptoms that are going around, and those symptoms are that she has big titties, a sweet pussy, and a great ass.