Push jokes
A note for my old English Teacher:
Mr. Colin, who loves making a din, He thinks everyone loves him, but little does he know, That's not what everyone shows, About his life he ploughs and ploughs, About his dog Bella and his relationship woes... Mr. Colin, we do not care, When you speak, our minds are not there, Your life you have unnecessarily shared, When we see you, our eyesight is impaired... Mr. Colin, rumbling about his exceptions, Just when someone puts something in the bin, Or chatters to someone, not even causing a din, But Mr. Colin, drinking too much gin, Will flail all his annoying attention on him, He'll push his limits, right to the rim...
And just how I love flan! Oh, he's finally gone!
Your hairline is pushed back; we can see what you are thinking of.
Your hairline left you because you were too ugly for your push back hairline.
How to turn on an Indian: push the red button.
The COVID-19 situation has been especially stressful for the Flat Earth Society.
They fear that social distancing measures could push people over the edge.
"Hola, soy Dora. Do you see the cliff? Say, "backpack." Tell her that we need Amanda. While I push her off the cliff, you will not peek. Did you just peek? Close your eyes, you silly goose." The end.
I pushed a dog into a fire and said, "Hot dog!"
I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into a campfire and shouted out "Hot Wheels!"
Kid: Hey, Mum, why are we pushing the car off the cliff?
Mum: Shut up, son, you’ll wake your father!
How is a push-up bra like a bag of chips?
As soon as you open it, you realize it’s half empty.
Principal: “Why did you have to skip class? Because of that detention!”
Kid: “Whatever!”
Principal: “Why did you have to swear? Because of that one demerit!”
Kid: “Doesn't matter!”
Principal: “Why did you yell at a teacher and throw a chair at them? Because of that you're suspended!”
Kid: “Oh well!”
Principal: “Why did you have to push a kid down the stairs and kill them? Because of that you're expelled!”
Kid: “I'm trying not to kill myself!”
I was at the bank yesterday.
A lady asked to check her balance, so I pushed her over.
My wife is so ugly when she was born, the doctor said, "I did everything I could, but she pulled through anyways." When she was born, the doctor hung himself with the umbilical cord. He pushed her back in, said, "Not done." The doctor slapped her mother. The doctor looked at her and said, "Twins!" He didn't know what end to slap. He threw her away and kept the afterbirth.
I pushed a man in a wheelchair into a fire. Now we call him "hot wheels."
Your hairline is so pushed back, it's looking like it got slapped up by Will Smith.
I pushed a handicapped orphan out of his wheelchair. Who is he gonna tell, his parents?
Royal rebel and push so back, they ever marble say that drink pushback.
When you push your grandma out of her wheelchair and steal it.
“They see me rollin’, they hatin’.”
Your hairline pushed back lookin' like you got slapped up by Will Smith.
Your hairline is so pushed back it looks like Will Smith slapped it back.