Priest's jokes
A priest, a pedophile, and a rapist walk into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink.
What did the priest say to the skunk?
Let us spray.
What do McDonald's and a priest have in common? They both put their meat in 10 year old buns.
Why do Roman Catholics have so many kids?
So there’s more for the priest.
What are priests' favorite shoe?
White Vans.
What job do you want if you don't want people's twos since?
A Catholic priest.
What's a similarity between The Ark of the Covenant, The Holy Grail and a bunch of 12 year olds? They are all locked in the Priest's basement.
A 23 year old priest walks into a high school with an automatic weapon. He tells those who believe in God to stand up and leave.
To the children who don't leave, he says, "Do not worry my children, I shall make thou 'hole-y' as well."
He then proceeds to shoot all of the students left.
My friend just told me about reverse exorcisms.
In these, the demon tells the priest to get out of the child.
What's similar between McDonald's and priests?
They both stick their meat in 10-year-old buns.
You ever hear of a reverse exorcism?
It's where the devil tells the priest to get out of the child.
What is a similarity between priests and doctors?
They both have fetishes for their professions.
When the priest said, "Be gone from this boy, demon!" the demon replied, "And you get out of the boy!"
When you go to the priest's basement, you will always find the pope's body and his children in the corner of the room.
What do you call a priest in a room full of naked boys?
A colonoscopy.
What has 2 legs and loves to play with little kids? The local priest.
How come I have a father but not a dad?
He was a priest.
A priest was driving down the road when a cop pulled him over.
The cop asked him if he had anything to drink. The priest said just water.
The cop said, "Then why can I smell wine?"
The priest said, "Good Lord, it happened again!"
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Why did the pope drink horse piss? Because a priest asked him what would he do for a Klondike bar? 🤪 😜
How can you tell the difference between a Christian priest and a zit?
One waits until you're twelve to come on your face.