Practice jokes

In what ways do nuns and hoes have something in common?

They both worship on their knees. They are both creatures of habit. They both take vows of poverty and obedience. Once chosen, neither can leave the life. They both swallow their hosts.

My mom showed me that she could deep throat a banana. I asked how you know how to do that. My mom said, "I practice on your stepfather."

I caught my sister licking up and down and deep throating a banana. I said, "Why are you doing that for?" She replied, "I'm doing it for practice for your friends."

Name something you practiced kissing on as a kid.

Sister. SWEET HOME ALABAMA!

Your mom's just like a penny. Practically worthless, and in everyone's pants.

Always practice safe sex: paint an X on the sheep that kick.

I live next to a kindergarten, and yesterday they had a fire drill. It was kinda weird because normally it's me who has a drill around little children.

What did the cannibal say to the other?

"Can I practise on you?"

There was a Cheerio that had a job. He worked hard at it, and the boss came up and promoted him to the vice president of the Cheerios. So he needed a speech. He kept practicing and practicing and now he was thirsty. It was almost time for his speech, so he went to the drinking fountain, but there was a huge line. So he went to the lake, but he saw tons of garbage and what he thought was a cereal killer. So he found this bowl of punch, but he realized... there was no punchline.

How do you become with NATO? Promise no more world wars by secretly performing military practices behind their back.

Csgo is just practice for when you want to one tap some 3rd graders

Me: What do you call a group of retards?

Friend: Down town?

Me: Nope, target practice.

Why did God make pigs before politicians?

He just needed some practice.

"Banjo players spend half their lives tuning... and the other half out of tune."

I'm a banjo picker, and I can confirm this is 99% true.

One time Chuck Norris peed in the gas tank of a semi truck as a practical joke. That truck is now known as Optimus Prime.

Where do religious kids practice sports?

In the prayground.