Porn jokes

What is a porn star's favourite potato crisp flavour...

Prawn cocktail.

What does a perverted frog say?

"Rubbit."

New civil war themed porn title: “Harriet Tubman gets hit with something other than an iron ingot.”

Q: What did the porn actress say when she opened the door?

A: Make sure to come upstairs!

What is the difference between hungry and horny?

The cucumber goes to different places.

My homework was to watch as much porn as I can... and tell my teacher the details so he won't get in trouble for watching it during class.

What do you call an orphan with a boner?

Porn.

What’s the difference between how you watch porn and I watch porn?

The windows we watch through.

So this is how I got divorced.

On my birthday my boss, who was a hot sexy woman who I have always had an eye on her huge ass and tits, wished me happy birthday and took me to her house. She went into the shower and came out dressed and this made me disappointed. But then she stripped off and made my dick go into her pussy and before I could realize I heard her main door creak. And in came my wife, mum, and my 2 kids, 8 years old and 12 years old. Although my wife joined in, she was mad after since that was not my wife, that was my wife's twin sister. Do not know why woman these days are like this!!!!!!!!!!

Mum finds out child cheats in math test.

Mom says, "There is no cheating in this house."

Child: "Then why did you cheat with my math teacher last night?"

Here is a dark joke for you guys... "Why do pornstars scream, "DADDY!" in their videos? Because they were child molested by their father!"

For pedophiles, watching teen porn must be like watching mature porn.

Fancy playing rodeo sex?

"OK then," she said!

Then put your dick in her ass and say it’s not as tight as your sister’s ass and hold on for dear life... real life cow bow boy shit!

Women be like, "Porn is how we get money," then get angry when boys treat women like shit because they seen it on porn.

There is this fish, and this fish thinks if that fly drops 6 inches, I’m gonna jump out the water and eat that fucking fish!

Then there is a bear, he thinks if that fly drops six inches, that fish jumps up - I’m gonna run out there and eat that fucking fish!

This huntsman also thinks to himself 🧐 if that fly drops six inches, fish jumps up, bear runs out, eats the fish. I’m gonna shoot that fucking bear.

Unbelievably there is a tiny little brave mouse, who also thinks to himself 🧐 if that fly drops six inches, fish jumps, bear runs, huntsman shoots,

He’s bound to drop that cheese sandwich in his back pocket!!!!

I’m gonna eat that fucking cheese sandwich!!

Meanwhile...

there’s This cat!!!’ He sees what’s going on - if they fly drops six inches -the fish =bear =huntsman =mouse eating the cheese sarnie....

Easy pickings...

Anyway bang 💥 the fly drops six inches. Fish jumps up. Bear grabs the fish. Huntsman shoots the fucking bear,

DROPS HIS CHEESE SARNIE!!

Cat runs after mouse trying to get the cheese sarnie

The cat slips over him (stacks it) cat falls in the river...

LONG STORY I KNOW BUT THE MORAL OF THE STORY IS...

every time a fly drops six inches a pussy get wet)

WALLOP... try remembering all that in A pub pissed. Xx

If Batman is half bat and half human, how was he made?

"He wasn't because you can't f*ck a bat."

What do you call a rooster lollipop?

A cock sucker!

I like porn a lot. I was wondering if you guys can talk to me.

"Are you my homework? Because I want to slam you on my desk and do you all night."

Roses are red, oranges are orange.

Get a life, quit watching porn.