Why can't America play chess?
Because it lost two towers.
What is Trump's favorite snack?
Cheetos.
(Get it? He looks like a Cheeto!)
What makes genders and Twin Towers similar?
There used to be two of them, and now it's a sensitive subject.
What does Joe Biden say to young girls when he leaves the room?
"Smell ya later!"
Why does Joe Biden call women muffins?
'Cause muffins backwards is sniffum.
"Ukraine be like Escape to Witch Mountain!"
I'm back and wearing dead whites who are killing whites from Eastern Europe on me. Shout out my boy russia and Ukraine, they all are evil just like USA and China and the rest of the west!
To teach kids about democracy, I let them vote on dinner. They picked tacos.
Then I made pizza because they donβt live in a swing state.
Have you ever heard of the Russian politician who was so afraid of the dark that, instead of going to the bathroom at night, he would use a metal tin that he kept underneath his bed?
His name is Vladimir Pootin.