Politics

Politics jokes

America

I don't even know why to joke about America, it's a joke itself TO THE FUCKING EARTH!

War

Germany: As long as America stays out of the war, we should win.

Japan: *bombing Pearl Harbor* Cowabunga It Is!!

Snack

What is Trump's favorite snack?

Cheetos.

(Get it? He looks like a Cheeto!)

Carrot

If Trump colored his hair green and wore an orange shirt and pants, I will call him a carrot.

Hillary

If Hillary and Biden got locked in a room together, all they would talk about is how to ruin America and make a plan to steal children.

Hitler

You know, when women clean their nails with chemicals, no one cares, but when Hitler tries to clean Poland with chemicals, everyone goes crazy.

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  • Twin Towers

    What makes genders and Twin Towers similar?

    There used to be two of them, and now it's a sensitive subject.

    Commie

    I wanted to tell a commie a joke about food, but he’d have to wait 10 years to get it.

    Joe Biden

    Why does Joe Biden like cold weather? Because he’s used to being in the teens.

    Mom

    Your mom's so fat, Donald Trump built the wall around her.

    Mind

    "Have you driven through Dealey Plaza? It will blow your mind."

    ~John F. Kennedy

    War

    I'm back and wearing dead whites who are killing whites from Eastern Europe on me. Shout out my boy russia and Ukraine, they all are evil just like USA and China and the rest of the west!

    Democracy

    To teach kids about democracy, I let them vote on dinner. They picked tacos.

    Then I made pizza because they don’t live in a swing state.