Whatβs the similarities between a pillow and your mom?
Theyβre both in my bed.
I had a dream that I was destroying the world, and I blew up my house for fun. I woke up and couldn't find my pillow... nor the house.
You went to the bed store asking for a water bed. They put a pillow and sheets on the ocean.
Your mama is so stupid that she put a ruler under her pillow to see how long she slept.
Don't give up on your dreams...
Keep sleeping.
Bf: Hey, what ya doing?
Gf: Just lying in bed.
Bf: Just lying in bed?
Gf: And eating cereal.
Bf: Ha, nice, what would you do if I was in bed next to you...?
Gf: Eat my cereal.
Bf: I mean if the cereal wasn't there.
Gf: I'd get out of bed and get more cereal.
I might not be able to make my bed, but at least I can get out of it.
Q: What's the similarity between a dog and a bed?
A: I can jump on my bed. A: And I use a pillow on both of them.
I hope both sides of your pillow are warm tonight.
When you fall asleep on the couch and wake up in your bed.
But you know you live alone.
What is a good night sleep tight I have for
Never challenge death to a pillow fight.
Unless you're prepared for the reapercushions.
Why did the pillow cross the road?
To get to a mattress store!
So, I was laying in bed and it's winter, so my room is always cold because the heater doesn't work.
And I was thinking.... It would be warmer if someone else was laying here with me.... Then I laughed because who would wanna be with me. Hahaha
I love going to sleep at night.
The last 2 words you say after sex before going to sleep ?
Goodnight Mom !
I've been taking Viagras for sunburn It keeps the sheets of my bed at night
I couldn't find my cat, and then my pillow started meowing.
What does it mean when there is a man in your bed, gasping for breath and saying your name?
It just means that you didn't hold the pillow down long enough.
a man comes to a bar and has a drink then his bully came to him and Stoll his drink then the bully asked "what wrong" the man said that "I trying to kill myself I try getting hit by a Tran but the train went on the different track then I try to jump of a brig but I fell on a bot full of pillows then I try to Posen myself " then the bully say "then what " then man replied you just dunked it "then the man left.
