Pet jokes
Bob the Golden Retriever and Lily the Husky were talking at Bob's house.
Lily: Bob, do you think I'm fat?
Bob: No, Lily, of course not! You're just a little husky!!!! Lol. Golden Retrievers are funny.
There were three cats. The first cat said, "Meow." The second cat said, "Meow." The third cat said, "Meow meow." Then the first cat said, "Don't change the subject!"
I had to take my pet octopus to the vet yesterday.
Oh, donāt worry, heās okay now.
But the vet charged me six quid.
Zozo the hobo has two frogs and a bunny cage from pet expo. Why? Because he wanted a pet, you idiot!
One dog said to the other dog, "Man, it is hard sleeping on the floor."
The other said, "Really? I like my bed."
Memes
What do you call a dog with no legs?
Anything you want; it won't chase you.
What does a stray cat/dog have in common?
Both of them don't have a home!
"Simba is proof cats donāt always land on their feet."
What do you call a dog without legs?
Nothing, it won't come either way.
Why do orphans love dogs?
Because dogs stay with them.
Why canāt orphans have a house pet?
Because its parents have it to itself.
All doggies go to heaven - or so I've been told.
They run and play along the streets of Gold.
Why is heaven such a doggie-delight...
Why, because there's not a single cat in sight.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesnāt matter; it aināt coming to you.
Meow meow meow meow :p
My dog is named Max, and he likes to eat dog food. Therefore, everyone named Max likes to eat dog food.
There were ten cats in a boat, and one jumped out. How many were left?
None, 'cause they are all copycats.
Now their owner is dying.
HAHAHAHA
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn't f***ing matter, it's still not f***ing coming.
Chihuahua?
Why do I call my dog a vibrator?
Because every time my dog acts like a dildo, I beat him, and when I beat him, he shakes. What do you call a shaking dildo? A vibrator, therefore I call my dog a vibrator.