Pet jokes
I adopted a dog. It's gone now.
At least homeless people in China are not starving.
My friend made a joke about dogs. I said it was a RUFF joke.
Now their owner is dying.
HAHAHAHA
There's no Asian kids in my class, but it just happens to be the rice store and the pet store just ran out of stock...
Right, I have a dog and his name is Syndrome, and whenever he is good, I go "Good Syndrome," but whenever he is naughty, I go "Down Syndrome."
I did a good walk and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and people live in the house with my dog. I had to a dog and.
Why do cats like to sleep on the floor?
'Cause it's a car-PET.
I left my dog at home once, and when I came home it was a mess. Let's just say I was in a RUFF situation.
My bird. PRETTY BIRD! PRETTY BIRD!
Others CHIRP CHIRP CHIRP!
My cat is red and brown and her bones are crunchy, so does that mean she is a Kit Kat?
What’s the difference between a cat and a dog? It’s easier to throw a cat against the wall.
Chihuahua?
Me holding a new cat: Say hi to my little friend!
My friends: Hi to my little friend!
I would name my dog "Five Miles" so I could say I walk five miles every day, but today I ran over Five Miles.
I went to the zoo but all I saw was a dog.
Yeah, it was a shih tzu!
Mom: I'm getting you a dog!
Me: OMG REALLY?!
Mom: Yeah, what gender do you want?
Me:...
Me: Bitch, please.
A man was about to go into the bar with his dog when he realized the sign said, “No pets allowed!” He was about to walk away when another guy walked up with his dog. The 2nd man put on dark shades and said, “Just pretend you're blind!” He walked in with his dog, got a drink, then left.
The 1st man did the same thing, but when he walked in, the bartender said, “You know your ‘guide dog’ is a chihuahua, right?”
The man said, “They gave me a damn Chihuahua?!”
When you can’t have Chinese food because you don’t have any pets,
just eat African food, you have plenty of neighbors!
What time do dogs 🐕 get a walk done ✅?
Time to walk with your dog 🐶!
What kind of dog can do magic tricks?
A labracadabrador.