Parent jokes

Father: I'm taking your toys to the orphanage.

Child: But why?

Doctor: I'm going to have to turn you away.

Orphan: But why?

Why do orphans want to die?

Because they might see their parents in Heaven.

What is an orphan’s favorite game? Adopt me.

What does a deaf person and an orphan have in common? They both can’t hear their parents.

Why can’t an orphan go to Family Dollar? They don’t have a family.

Don’t mess with an emo because if their friends pull up, you gotta fight the suicide squad.

Why don't orphans go to the park?

Because their parents can't push them on the swing!

Why does an orphan play mum and dad?

'Cause they need self-love.

I hate it when couples get into a little fight and they change their Facebook status to "single." I have fights with my parents, but I don't change my Facebook status to "orphan."

If you’re ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

Why do orphans go to church?

So at least they will have someone to call father.

Why can't an orphan play baseball?

Because they can't find home! 😂🤣

If you're mad, hire an orphan, what are they gonna do, tell their parents? 🤣🤣

What do you call an orphan?

A bootysnagger45.

I will call my kid Monday, because whenever I see him, I feel disappointment.

What's the similarity between a 14-year-old girl and the fetus inside her?

They're both thinking, "Oh fuck, mom is gonna kill me!"

If you're pan, all you have to do is get a sibling and make them get your parents to the outside of the pantry, and you burst out and then say you're pansexual!

What's the difference between an orphan and a Chinese kid?

The Chinese kid has a home.

Mum: Why are roses red?

Child: Stop, Mum, you never make jokes.

Mum: I made you.

My mom gave me a box of chocolates, and she said life is like a box of chocolates, but then it kind of tastes like dog shit.

Me: "I came home laughing."

Parents: "What's wrong?"

Me: "The teacher asked everyone a question. Luckily, I was the only one who knew."

Parents: "Good for you, Johnny. What was the fantastic question your teacher gave everyone and only you knew?"

Me: "Well, it's kinda complicated, but here it goes."

Parents: "What is it?"

Me: "Who farted?"

What do Chinese parents hate the most?

A newborn daughter...