Parent jokes
What do blind kids and orphans have in common?
They both can't see their parents.
Kidnapper: Hey kid, your parents told me to pick you up.
Kid: Sir, this is an orphanage.
Kidnapper: ...
Who comes when an orphan gets married? They are allowed back in family restaurants, but when I go in alone, I'm not allowed. I have some parents, for God's sake!
Father: I'm taking your toys to the orphanage.
Child: But why?
Doctor: I'm going to have to turn you away.
Orphan: But why?
Why do orphans want to die?
Because they might see their parents in Heaven.
What does a deaf person and an orphan have in common? They both can’t hear their parents.
Why can’t an orphan go to Family Dollar? They don’t have a family.
Don’t mess with an emo because if their friends pull up, you gotta fight the suicide squad.
People tell me to be nice to orphans, so I say, "What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?"
I hate it when couples get into a little fight and they change their Facebook status to "single." I have fights with my parents, but I don't change my Facebook status to "orphan."
What is an orphan’s favorite game? Adopt me.
Why don't orphans go to the park?
Because their parents can't push them on the swing!
If you’re ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Why does an orphan play mum and dad?
'Cause they need self-love.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because they can't find home! 😂🤣
Mum: Why are roses red?
Child: Stop, Mum, you never make jokes.
Mum: I made you.
What's the difference between an orphan and a Chinese kid?
The Chinese kid has a home.
If you're mad, hire an orphan, what are they gonna do, tell their parents? 🤣🤣
I will call my kid Monday, because whenever I see him, I feel disappointment.
What's the similarity between a 14-year-old girl and the fetus inside her?
They're both thinking, "Oh fuck, mom is gonna kill me!"
What do you call an orphan?
A bootysnagger45.
Why do orphans go to church?
So at least they will have someone to call father.