Parent

Parent jokes

Orphanage

I was at work and then a little kid came up to me and she said, "What happened to all the parents?" She sounded so confused, so I told her, "It's only yours, kid, they left you on purpose." She cried. I felt bad for a second and thought, oh well, time to get back to my job at the orphanage.

Orphan

Teacher: What do you kids want to be when you grow up?

Kid 1: I want to be a firefighter.

Kid 2: I want to be a police officer.

Kid 3: I want to be dead like both my parents.

Teacher: Ok, everyone pull out your books.

Kid 4: Are we going to ignore what he said?

Teacher: What do you want me to do? Call his parents?

Orphan

What's the difference between an orphan and a Chinese kid?

The Chinese kid has a home.

Orphan

Why do orphans want to die?

Because they might see their parents in Heaven.

Orphan

What does a deaf person and an orphan have in common? They both can’t hear their parents.

Why can’t an orphan go to Family Dollar? They don’t have a family.

Don’t mess with an emo because if their friends pull up, you gotta fight the suicide squad.

Orphan

Father: I'm taking your toys to the orphanage.

Child: But why?

Doctor: I'm going to have to turn you away.

Orphan: But why?

Orphanage

Kidnapper: Hey kid, your parents told me to pick you up.

Kid: Sir, this is an orphanage.

Kidnapper: ...

Uncle Joe

Hi, my name is Uncle Joe, and I like kids in a way that makes their parents not trust me anymore.

Orphan

What do blind kids and orphans have in common?

They both can't see their parents.

Orphan

Who comes when an orphan gets married? They are allowed back in family restaurants, but when I go in alone, I'm not allowed. I have some parents, for God's sake!

Orphan

If you’re ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

Orphan

People tell me to be nice to orphans, so I say, "What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?"

Orphan

To all of you making jokes about orphans, it’s all fun and games until both of your parents leave you.

LMFAO (my parents left me and it’s not the funniest thing ever)

Orphanage

I saw a child crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were.

Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage.

Orphan

Why don't orphans go to the park?

Because their parents can't push them on the swing!

Facebook status

I hate it when couples get into a little fight and they change their Facebook status to "single." I have fights with my parents, but I don't change my Facebook status to "orphan."

Orphan

Why do orphans go to church?

So at least they will have someone to call father.