Jim walks into a bar and asks for a shot of vodka. He then says to the barkeep, "Who's the toughest guy in here?" The barkeep points to a man at the pool table. Jim then knocked him out and paid for the shot and left. He did this every Friday for 2 months. Finally, the barkeep is pissed because Jim keeps knocking out all of his customers. He then orders a gorilla and puts him in the bathroom. Jim walks into the bar and gets another shot of vodka. He asks again, "Who's the toughest guy in here tonight?" The bartender points to the bathroom and says he's in there. Jim walks into the bathroom and everyone in the bar can hear yelling and screaming. The bartender asks, "What happened in there?" Jim smiles and says, "I don't know who that was, but when he wakes up tell him I put his fur jacket int the toilet."
you say this to your friend damn your nuts are bigger then mine* thinks the wrong way* friend: i must order more nuts
When dose a dyslexic person no when they've spelt their address wrong when ordering online when It fails to turn up
blud so old he pre ordered the torah
A man walks Into a bar and orders a cardigan and soke
Watch out plane! Wait really I ordered pepperoni
Say the drive through at MacDonald order (don't say the sake) but when you get it ask them my sake and say sake that ass
Symptoms of Schizophrenia The symptoms of this condition are fairly easy to recognize, because they stand out so distinctly from a person’s usual behavior. In order for a diagnosis to be made, the person must suffer from two more of the following for at least one month:
Delusions Hallucination
As the coronavirus pandemic strengthens... Trump - "Quick, inject yourselves with bleach" Also Trump - "I order everyone in America to wear a face mask except for me"
yo'mama sometimes always happens to let you know you're back in New York -- like the way people order in a restaurant: 'Could you take my order before Jesus gets back? What's the matter with you? I've evolved into another species here, you understand? I can't eat clam chowder no more. I gotta see the cyborg menu, you understand?'
Hi guys, so today I am going to do another blog. It's just for fun, and yeah. Enjoy! So, this morning, when I woke up, I heard that I was getting new grips, I was so excited. (Incase you guys don't know what grips are, they are sort of like gloves that go on your hands and they are for gymnastics bars.) I was excited because my old grips don't fit me anymore and my coach was like "Oh I can get you some new ones since we have a meet in a week." And so I was like "Oh that's fine. My parents ordered me some. Thank you though." And she was like "Okay that's fine. Just make sure you have them by next week" So long story short, I have new grips now.
So, this guy walked into a cannibal bar. The barista asked him what he wants, and the man ordered water. Then he left, because he wasn't a cannibal and just wanted a glass of water.
Me and my cousin went to a restaurant yesterday I ordered my chicken fried, he ordered his chicken alive
why were the people during 9/11 mad? they ordered 2 sausage pizzas but instead they got 2 plane pizzas
What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Two large planes!
Stormtrooper: What happened to the Jedi order? Palpatine: Slew it!
What is a mouse’s 🐭 favorite side order?
Cheese Fries 🍟😋