I like my women like I like my wine, twelve years old, in the basement, and locked up.
When I masturbate, things cum.
When an old man does, no one cums.
A 98 year old man goes to bed on a one layer bed. He wakes up under it...
What's great about having sex with twenty-eight year olds?
There's ate of them.
Have you ever wondered how your teachers would look if they were 20 years younger than they actually are? I bet some of them would be smoking hot. Especially my 25-year-old English teacher. I'd bang her if she were 20 years younger.
What's the best part about having sex with twenty-seven year olds?
There's twenty of them!
Quit making those progeria jokes. They get old very quickly.
Your mama is so old that she forgot her donkey on Noah's Ark.
How do you find a redneck virgin?
Just look for a 4-year-old. They can run faster than her brothers.
Why did the chicken cross the road To get to the other side
Dead baby jokes never get old...
Statistics show that 1 in 3 people live next to a pedophile. However, I think that's a lie because I just live next to 2 stunning 8-year-olds.
What is the difference between an old chest and a kid? One doesn't cry when you drop it in the basement.
Yo mama so old, she was in third grade with Moses.
What's the difference between a 14-year-old boy and an 8-year-old boy?
The 14-year-old is on top, the 8-year-old is on the bottom.
OK, there are at least 3 pedophiles in your neighborhood.
But there are no pedophiles in my neighborhood; there are only three 10-year-old girls with juicy asses.
What does a 90 year old's pussy taste like?
Depends...
Michael Jackson and Tonya Harding got together back in the day for a horse racing venture. Tonya says, "I'll handle the handicapping, you go ride the 3-year-olds."
What did I eat for breakfast yesterday?
10 year olds.
Old man goes to the doctor.
The doctor says, "The test results are back, and I'm sad to say you have cancer and Alzheimer's."
The old man says, "Phew! At least it's not cancer!"
