Not jokes

Why is it okay to hit orphans?

It's not like they can tell their parents.

Me: Knock knock.

Orphan: Who's there?

Me: Not your family.

Emos do take shots of themselves... not with a camera, though.

One day an orphan threw a boomerang. It's not the only thing that didn't come back.

What is Hitler's favorite letter?

Not-Z.

Did you hear the gossip about butter? Never mind, I butter not spread it...

Why should you not let an orphan play baseball?

They don’t know where home is. 😢

It was so cold out today believe it or not, I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets!

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

It's not surprising there isn't a whole lot of good tree jokes.

Most foresters have a wooden personality.

Why does Mexico not have an Olympic team?

Because all of them that can jump, swim, and run are already here.

Why does a woodpecker have a beak?

So as to not smash his head against the tree.

My wife and I have reached the decision that we do not want children.

If anyone does, please comment your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.

I have OCD and ADD, so everything has to be perfect... but not for very long.

Why did the roster cross the road twice?

To prove it was not a chicken.

People say that Pakistan is a terrorist nation...

Guys, it's not true, even Osama bin Laden lived there peacefully for 6 years.

I tell dad jokes all the time even though I’m not actually a dad.

I’m a faux pa.

"White people can't jump..."

"You must not have seen the Twin Towers on 9/11."

Why do white people own a lot of pets?

Because they're not allowed to own people anymore.

My sister said to roast her, but my mom said I'm not allowed to burn trash.