Worst Jokes Ever
Russians think they are tougher than Americans. Here are some reasons for the Russians out here reading this:
1. USA was NEVER invaded!
2. USA never commits as many war crimes as Russia does!
3. USA made the first nuclear weapon so yeah shove that up your ass, Russians!
4. Our soldiers don’t rape kids.
5. We have more allies than you.
6. We are smaller but stronger.
7. Random civilians in the USA have stronger guns than Russian military does!
Why do you have to pay to see Russian people?
Because the zoo is not free, Duhhhhh🙄
Here is a story, my best friend was Chinese, his name was Chong-king. I took him to a restaurant one day and he said, "I am Chong-king." I said I know your name is Chong-king, within a few minutes he just randomly died making weird noises and turning blue by every second.
Anyone know what happened?
*America shoots down balloon*
China: "You killed an innocent man!!"
USA: "What?!"
China: "Yes, he was a famous sumo wrestler."
Why did the Japanese NOT shoot down the American plane that was dropping atomic bombs?
From what their eyes saw, it was a piece of rice.
What did the Americans call the Battle of Midway after Pearl Harbor?
The Jap trap.
Ok guys, I have one last joke (for now).
What do you call it when Panera is over?
Panera end.
What do you call a prostitute weed dealer?
A pot-hole.
You know you have twisted humor when you crack a smile when a Minecraft farmer says he separates the white sheep from the colored ones.
Four kids at my school tried suicide and failed. They are now known as the Suicide Squad.
I gave my friend some paper. It cut his wrists.
My friend tried high-fiving me; I left him hanging.
Okay, so one time a deaf kid got into a car accident, but he didn't herd in on the news.
Why was the orphan so successful? Because when they were told “go big or go home,” they only had one option.
Why were the twin towers mad?
Because they ordered a cheese pizza, but instead they got plane.
Why were the Twin Towers mad?
Kid 1: "Hey, I bet you're still a virgin."
Kid 2: "Yeah, I was a virgin until last night."
Kid 1: "As if."
Kid 2: "Yeah, just ask your sister."
Kid 1: "I don't have a sister."
Kid 2: "You will in about nine months."
Orphans and Chinese people can’t play baseball. The orphans can’t find home, and the Chinese kid will eat the bat.
What’s long, white, and full of cream? A cheese stick.
I rate the Twin Towers 9/11, very stable buildings.