Worst Jokes Ever
Your hairline goes so far back that it stretches the length of Ohio.
It would be a miracle if someone figured out the length of your hairline.
I swear, if I compared the size of your mother and multiplied it by the time your dad was gone, it wouldn't even be close to your hairline.
Me: Mom, the weight scale wants your weight, not your phone number!
Why are you rolling your eyes? Are you looking for your brain?
Were you born on the highway? That is where most accidents happen.
How do you get a boy to share something? Bring in Michael Jackson's bed.
What do all rangas have in common?
They all look like wildfires.
Fat kid jumps in the pool.
The popular girl: "I thought there was going to be a tsunami."
The fat kid: "I thought trash was not supposed to be in the ocean."
Roses are red, violets are blue, there are kids in my basement, you'll be there soon.
People ask me if my friend jumps off a bridge, will I go as well? Of course not. I am a leader; I will go first, my friend will jump after me!
What is the difference between me and the Twin Towers?
My mom was only airplane feeding me a spoon.
What hit the ground first in a tree, a leaf or an emo kid?
The leaf, because an emo kid got a rope to save him!
So things are just too tiring to sort out... like which adoption center you should send your son to?
What hit the ground first in 9/11? The people.
*School Shooter Walks In*
That one kid who plays "Pumped Up Kicks" at max volume.
What do you call a crease join?
Hahaha
I was walking down the street when I saw my ex-girlfriend, so I fucked her. Turns out it was her identical twins that she never told me about.
And I decided to confront her. So I did the next time I saw her, but this time it was her identical triplet. There are 3 of them...
AND SHE NEVER BROUGHT THAT UP IN THE 7 YEARS I WAS DATING HER!
Hey! Guess what? I created a new word!
Plagiarism!
Why do orphans like cows?
Because when they leave, they bring back the milk.