Worst Jokes Ever
What has 5 legs, 3 arms, and 7 feet?
The finish line at the marathon bombing.
Helen Keller walked into a bar.
Then a table.
Then a chair.
Two blondes walk into a bar. I thought one of them would have seen it.
Trystan Leonard is going out with Katelynn O'Toole.
I guess you could say Stephen Hawking is a dead meme.
Why was Stephen Hawking good at football? Because he is a pro dribbler.
Can't wait for Stephen Hawking's next update.
What's long, hard, and has cum in it?
A cuCUMber.
"Jasmine is gay, now THAT is a joke."
What’s weaker than a daffodil? Mundy’s ankles.
Jim walks into a bar and asks for a shot of vodka. He then says to the barkeep, "Who's the toughest guy in here?"
The barkeep points to a man at the pool table. Jim then knocked him out and paid for the shot and left. He did this every Friday for 2 months. Finally, the barkeep is pissed because Jim keeps knocking out all of his customers. He then orders a gorilla and puts him in the bathroom.
Jim walks into the bar and gets another shot of vodka. He asks again, "Who's the toughest guy in here tonight?" The bartender points to the bathroom and says he's in there. Jim walks into the bathroom and everyone in the bar can hear yelling and screaming. The bartender asks, "What happened in there?" Jim smiles and says, "I don't know who that was, but when he wakes up tell him I put his fur jacket in the toilet."
Why did Sally drop her ice cream cone?
Because she got hit by a bus.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
They unplugged the wifi.
How do you get 100 babies in the back of a pick up truck? Blender.
How do you get them back out? Straw.
One day, a snail got robbed by two turtles. Once the cops arrived and asked what had happened, the snail said, "I don't know, it all happened too fast!"
What has four wheels and flies?
A garbage truck.
Leave a like down below if you think Stephen Hawking should stand for the National Anthem.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
'Cause they don't know where home is.
Why did the duck not enjoy his restaurant date?
Because he didn't want to see the bill.
What do French ducks say?
Quoi quoi.