Worst Jokes Ever
Where did Amy go after the explosion?
Everywhere.
Why can’t Stephen Hawking go to heaven?
Because it’s a stairway to heaven, not a ramp.
The morbid jokes on this site.
I can tell why the Founding Fathers adopted the Constitution, because nobody likes it.
Why does Barry Bannan laugh when he plays football?
Because the grass tickles his balls because he's so short.
Why didn’t Stephen Hawking go to heaven?
He couldn’t climb the stairway.
What do you call a zombie?
Nothing because zombies aren’t real, and if they were, you would be dead.
What's the fastest way to Shepherd's Bush?
Up Shepherd's leg.
How do you fit 1000 babies in a swimming pool?
A blender.
How do you get them out? Slurp them up with a straw.
Why did the girl fall off the swing?
Coz she had no arms, bants!
Where do whales get weighed?
The whaleway station.
Bants ahahahahahahahahahahhahahahashahahhhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
Animal jokes, eh?
Toucan play at that game.
What did one needle say to the other?
"You be looking sharp!"
What's worse than 3 babies in one trashcan?
One baby in three trashcans.
What's worse than a pile of dead babies?
One at the bottom that's still alive.
What's worse than that?
It's forced to eat its way out.
What's even worse than that?
It comes back for seconds.
Why did Helen Keller's dog run away?
You would too if your name was "Raraaaughhaugh."
How long does it take a baby to cook in the microwave?
I don't know. I close my eyes when I masturbate.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends, how hard can you throw them?
Once I saw a mirror... and that was when I got the ability to become a ghost.
A mirror and a terrorist are the same... Only... a mirror doesn't need a gun to kill.