Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

I wonder if Stephen Hawking heard the song "Gangster's Paradise." Oh, shit, he can't!

Me: Hey, wanna know my spirit animal?

Friend: Sure.

Me: Roadkill, because I can see my mom pretty clearly now.

Friend: Wait, aren't you dead?

Me: Aren't you my son?

Friend: So that's what Mom was trying to hide from me.

I just came up with a really good deaf people joke! The great thing is that they won't be able to hear it!

Why are women like diapers?

They’re usually full of shit, but thankfully disposable.

What do McDonalds and priests both do?

They both put their meat between 10-year-old buns.

Why do you put a baby into a blender feet first?

So you can see the look on its face...

Why did potassium draw a tear that would result in him crying?

Because all of his friends argon.

A man was forced off the Eiffel Tower, but he flew back up.

The executioners asked, "How'd you do that?"

He said, "I had magic chips. Here, take some."

They eat them, jump off, and die.

He asks for more chips, and the guy says, "You're a real a**hole when you're drunk, Superman!"

A girl and a boy were on a date. The boy kept farting. The girl asked, "What is wrong?!?". The boy replied, "Explosive diarrhea.". The girl said, "Ew".

The boy went to the bathroom, and the place exploded. The center of the explosion, the bathroom.

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