Why did the farmer eat a fork?
'Cause he's a dumbass.
You can laugh at how men are stupid. But remember their favorite thing.
It starts with "M" and ends with "arriage".
If you guessed "Marriage" you're stupid. It's miscarriage and don't forget it. The joke never gets old to him. Just like the baby.
Boi.
My Countryhumans OC, Sahara, is the daughter of France and Soviet. When people ask why, I tell them it was the gendersnapped version of my parents making me. France (my dad) was drunk and Soviet (my mom) was being horny. Then they judge me, so I judge them with a knife to the chest 47 times.
One night when I was six, I had this super annoying accent, and when I said the number "six," Oh no... One night my Catholic priest asked me how many cookies I needed for my family. I told him six, but thanks to my accent being mixed with many others including Scottish, French, and Russian, it sounded like I said "I need to have sex." He looked at me strange then pulled me into a closet, being a pedo.
When Momma asked me why I was missing for 6 hours, I told her, "I went to get the cookies like you told me to, and father raped the Christianity out of me." The angry look she gave my father was amazing. Then with my Papa, she beat the hell outta him.
Serves him right.
I was listening to my children praying, and my youngest that can speak said to me: "Mama, why is Gramma dead?"
I smiled and told her, "Well, less than 10 years ago when I was 5, your age, my Momma took me into the basement with some hot rando during a party. And 9 months later Shinana was born. One Pedo after another and your 4 siblings were born. The Pedo I met last night told me, 'If your mother's the one making you do this, do what you do best.' I listened and the next day she didn't leave her bed breathing. When the Pedo found out he left me and your soon to be brother."
She replies with, "Make his child support expensive!" Now he has to pay me 2,000 U.S. dollars every month, like the other ones that ran away.
What did 50 do when he was hungry?
58.
Dark humor is like a home; not everyone gets it.
Nobody:
Titanic: sYnCccCc
Iceberg: yAaaYeEee
People: yAaanOooO
Ocean: fUuudD
What's green and sticky?
... A stick.
Dario is gay
We all know Steven can’t post on here because he can’t pass the robot test.
what is steven hawkings mum? Your mum!
Kid asks, "What is dark humor?" Me *points*, "See that guy across the street..." Kid: "I can't... I'm blind." Me: "Exactly."
Why can't orphans play at a McDonald's play place? They don't have parent supervision.
When is a door not a door? When it is ajar.
What is a gay man's favorite hobby?
Cockfighting.
I went to a stand up show with the person who made my life a joke.
To be the perfect German, you need to be as thin as Göring, as tall as Goebbels, and as blonde as Hitler.
What's worse than placing 10 babies in a trash can?
Placing 1 baby in 10 trash cans...
