Worst Jokes Ever
Give a man a potato, he is full for a day.
Give a man a poisoned potato, he'll be full for the rest of his life.
If you have an overdose on a drug and die, then the lethal dose would be a lifetime supply.
If you have an overdose on a drug and die, then half of the least dose would be a lifetime supply.
My doctor said I could have up to 20 units a week. But now I've eaten half of my kitchen.
What do you get when you mix a fly and a rabbit?
Bugs Bunny!
What do you get when you cross a turkey and a centipede?
Drumsticks for everyone!
Using Pi, distract that fat kid next to you and copy his answers.
Do you want to hear a building joke?
I am still working on it.
And the children of Israel wandered round the desert for 40 years, until eventually Moses' wife said, "Are you going to ask for directions, or what?"
I would like to dedicate this song to a friend of mine, who was run over last week and is in hospital.
The wheels on the bus go round and round!
Nope, should've gone to Specsavers.
Let me just remove my finger from your bottom.
Thank you, nurse!
Would you mind just peeing into this cup, please? It's the one the annoying receptionist uses.
It's getting near midnight, and I can already hear Big Ben. He's upstairs pumping the wife.
One of my friends named Jill had a drug overdose.
She didn’t have any of that drug after that. For the rest of her life, she acted very high. When she died, it was because of natural causes, not the drug. So this proves that a lethal dose is also a life time supply.
And the winner of the Tour de France is awarded, as ever, with the yellow jersey.
To remind him what color his piss is meant to be.
What do you call a nervous zucchini?
An edgy veggie.
I love it when your parents come round for Christmas. I just wish we couldn't hear them through the ceiling.
Well, we've removed all of the excess fat from your body, and all that's left, I'm afraid, is the wig, Mrs. Trump.
Look! An ancient African city!
From the makers of Timbukone...