What sank the Titanic?
GODZILLA!
What do you call a Punjabi that’s drowning? Mandeep.
What happened when the man died? Yes.
Ads for meds be like: Chloroform, it's Chloroform, helps with itchy eyes. Side affects may include Acute Flaccid Myelitis (AFM), AIDS (HIV/AIDS), Alphaviruses, Alzheimer's Disease, Alzheimer's Diseases (Spanish), Arboviral Encephalitis, Arthritis, Babesiois, Cancer, Unintentional injuries, Chronic lower respiratory disease, Stroke and cerebrovascular diseases, Alzheimer's disease, Diabetes, Influenza and pneumonia.
If depression on crack fucked weed and 69 hours of not sleeping and had a baby with huge amounts of autism, that would be me.
I would tell a scoliosis joke.
But that would be completely out of line.
Charli tries to roast me: Roses are red, violets are blue, and you look like poo.
Me: You must have been born on the highway because that's where most accidents happen.
Why did the black guy cross the street to check King Van?
I was about to change my password to Fire-Fist Ace... but apparently it was too weak.
Big Mom is so fat, Trafalgar Law can’t make enough room for her!
I wanted another piece of pizza... but she said I could only have One Piece.
I will always remember my grandpa's last words after robbing a bank: "Oh, shit! The pigs are catching up!" But the cops did not kill him; he drove full speed off a cliff.
I was on the Oregon trail with my friend's brother, Carl. He got cholera, so we threw him off the wagon. When we came back, he was having a seizure and pooping uncontrollably. It was pretty cholerious.
up (DYM 94)
Why can’t orphans watch clean nice content? Because they are family friendly.
I was happy to find I could get a passing grade in all my subjects if I had sex with my teacher, until I remembered I'm home schooled.
Abraham Lincoln was a good man, he jumped out the window with his dick in his hand and walked up to a group of ladies and said I'm doing my duty so why don't you give me some booty?
What do you call the White House when a woman becomes President? A stable.
What do apples and depressed kids have in common?
They both hang on trees.
Q: Why did Stevie Wonder drown?
A: Because there wasn't a lifeguard in sight.
