What is Mexico's favorite sport? Cross country.
Why did the orphan wait in line?
To see their parents next.
Someone: "I WANNA BE THE SUN OF YOUR LIFE!"
Me: Then stay at 1,000,000 km of me.
Yo momma so fat that she don't need a backpack. She keeps her things in her Lagrangian points.
Who wants to fight!? Hate?! And pick on each other through the comments.
ANYONE?
My best friend got ligma. (Ah, did he? Sorry bro.) LIGMA BALLS!
A husband came back from a business trip and found out that his wife was pregnant. At first, he got a bit suspicious, but then he just ignored it and hugged his wife with happiness. The second when he met his friend and told him the news, the friend just said, "Wait, what? I thought she was on pills!"
Bully: "Shut up and give me your money, otherwise I will tell everyone that you are still a virgin."
Boy: "Haha, I am not a virgin anymore."
Bully: "Haha, nice joke."
Boy: "If you don't believe then ask your sister or brother."
Bully: "Hah, I don't have any sibling."
Boy: "Will just wait for 9 months then u will know."
My mum's a carrot.
Russian Santa Claus- You better watch out, You better not cry, cause if you do I will stab your fucking eye, Russian Santa Claus does not fuck around. He's making a list, He's checking it twice... You better leave out some Vodka with ice!
Why did the orphan have to eat his cereal with water?
Because his dad never came back with the milk.
What's the best thing about dating a blind chick?
She can't identify you.
Stephen Hawking robbed the Apple store looking for a charger.
Stephen Hawking talks by clicks. Two clicks is "hi," and five is "dab me up."
Stephen Hawking shows up to a car meet-up.
Stephen Hawking's last words were the Windows closing sound.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
Of a bad internet connection.
What's the best thing about an orphan GF?
You don't have to meet her parents.
Aloneness is not the joke, it's unfortunately my reality.
Your momma is so dumb that when they said it was chilly outside, she came outside with a bowl.
