Is George gay...? Stephen Hawking approves.
Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call someone smart and dead?
Stephen Hawking...
What did the glove say to his girlfriend?
I glove you!
A guy walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says, "If I can surprise you, I get a free drink." The bartender was unsure but agreed.
The guy pulled a 30cm long pianist out of his pocket, and he starts to play.
The bartender was surprised and gave the guy a free drink.
The guy then says, "You see, I have a little wizard in my pocket that grants wishes. Can I get another free drink if you get a free wish?"
The bartender agrees without hesitation.
The bartender wishes for 1000 bucks, but he gets 1000 ducks.
"WTF!" the man shouts.
The guy answered, "Did you think I wanted a 30cm long pianist?"
When a deaf person has sex, do they use one hand to moan?
When a deaf person is on trial, is it really considered a hearing?
What is smegma name?
What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
Where did Joe go after getting lost on a minefield? Everywhere.
My grief counselor died. He was so good, I don’t even care.
Why was the orphan so famous?
Because when they asked him go big or go home, he only had one option.
Emo kids counting be like: 1, 2, 3 come hang with me! 4, 5, 6 Gonna get new slits! 7, 8, 9 Suicide! 10, 11, 12 Bring some pills!
I was exploring a haunted mansion when I encountered a ghost named Pristiano Penaldo. He asked if I supported Burnley as he wanted to statpad against me. Luckily, I pulled out my trusty Liverpool shirt, and he disappeared. Shame on you, Penaldo.
I love my mom.
What do you call a Terrorist in a wheel chair?
RCXD in bound
What do ya call an emo that's hung himself? Hangman.
Q: What do you call an emo business? A: A cutting board.
People say rape is bad. It is because I don't want STD and HIV.
Friend #1: "What's your favourite thing about trees?"
Friend #2: "Apples"
Me: "I can hang myself in them."
"Knock, knock."
"Orphan: Who's there?"
"Not your parents."