I was doing a 10km run with my good friend Pessi. As we were setting up our smart watches, the watch voice asked us if we wanted to do a solo run or a group run.
Pessi proceeded to smash both our watches and shout, “I don’t want solo run, I want Penalty!”
Shame on you, Pessi!
Eibar-Man! Eibar-Man! Does whatever a ghost can.
Scores a tapin With Xaviesta’s assistance. Misses a pen From close distance.
Lookout! Here comes the Eibar-man!
What does a bear beat off with?
His bear hands.
Dark humor is like parents. Not everyone gets it.
That's wheely (really) sad.
What do you call a kid on a wheelchair?
Hot Wheels.
Why did Jesus play football?
He was Spanish, ayo.
My life is so sad it's because you're in it.
What do you call getting assaulted by a gay man? Fruit punch.
Friend: Wanna hear a joke?
Orphan Friend: Sure.
Friend: Parents.
Other: I don't get it.
Friend: And you never will.
How many blacks does it take to start a riot?
-1.
How do you name an Asian child?
Ring the doorbell.
What did the Chinese couple name their retarded baby?
Sum Ting Wong.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t get a home run.
Why don’t orphans have phones?? Because their parents can’t buy them one.
Why was the broom late? Because it had overslept.
What do you call an opener that doesn't work?
A can't opener.
What type of shirt do kangaroos wear? Jumpsuits.
Why can't you trust the atom? 'Cause they make up everything.
What is something that smells yuck? 🤮
Old bus seats.
