Mum jokes
Your mum is like a Golden Knight. She will still attack my tower with troops in the way, like Jude Porter.
Your mum (mom) so fat, she wore a yellow T-shirt, they said "Taxi!"
My dad came out of my step-sister's room as I came out of my step-mum's room.
Your mum is so cute that I asked for her number and she said yes, and now we're dating.
Your mum went to the dentist so she could install Bluetooth.
Q: What type of flowers do orphans hate? A: Mums.
Your mum is so fat, when she slept on the bed, the bed cracked and they had to replace it by a dinosaur.
I was absolutely fuming when I found out my mate was rifling through my mum's knicker drawer.
No one goes in there without my permission!
What's the similarity between your mum and West Ham?
Your mum blows spunk bubbles from her ass.
Why did my dad leave me and my mum?
I told him it wasn't big enough and then ran off saying, "Daddy, yeeeees!"
What did mum say when grandpa called?
Boomerang.
My mum said not to walk the streets because I won't find home the next day. I was an orphan.
I love punching orphans. What are they gonna do? Tell their mum?
Your mum is so ugly that aliens don’t come here.
I told my Mum, "Will you remember me in 6 minutes, 6 hours, 6 years?"
She said, "Yes."
"Knock knock."
I said, "My mum, who's there? You didn’t remember me!"
Welcome to youtube.com.
Where we treat our patients nicely.
Hi.
Your mum's vagina is so ravenous, that last night we both ended up on the living room floor, with her on top. She was eating my creamy young face off.
Why do I have to do the stupid joke, mum?
Your mum is so cool, she looks like a fridge. Quote: Jude Porters.
Your mum is so ugly, she tried to join an ugly competition. They said, "Sorry, no professionals."