Your mum is so ugly that aliens don’t come here.
I told my Mum, "Will you remember me in 6 minutes, 6 hours, 6 years?"
She said, "Yes."
"Knock knock."
I said, "My mum, who's there? You didn’t remember me!"
My mum said not to walk the streets because I won't find home the next day. I was an orphan.
What did mum say when grandpa called?
Boomerang.
What's the similarity between your mum and West Ham?
Your mum blows spunk bubbles from her ass.
Q: What type of flowers do orphans hate? A: Mums.
Your mum is so cute that I asked for her number and she said yes, and now we're dating.
"Ethan is gay," you say that, but first, who asked? And second, where's your mum at? Correction, where's your family, so how dare you? Now in the comments say sorry, or I'm coming for you! 😡😡😜😝
Your mum (mom) so fat, she wore a yellow T-shirt, they said "Taxi!"
My dad came out of my step-sister's room as I came out of my step-mum's room.
Your mom .com
Your mum is stupid, just like you.
Mum: Why are you throwing a paper plane at the twins?
Me: 😈
The average Irish person consumes 131.1 litres of beer, almost as much as your mum at night.
My mum told me to do the dog poo, but I couldn't find you anywhere.
your mums foreheads
Dad: Where is my son?
Son: Come join me with musical chairs, except we stand on them.
Dad: Ok, so do we put this round our neck?
Son: YES!
Mum: AHHHHHHHHHHHH
Your mum's hairline was so long that you decided to get therapy.
Little off topic but...
Mum: You wouldn't be here without me.
Son: And my birth certificate is a sorry letter from the condom factory.
Mum: Fair point.
Your mum is so fat, when she was sitting on a scale, the number couldn't even fit on the scale and came shooting out!
