Morbid jokes

Morbid jokes

War

Why did Germany win World War Two? Wait—that's not right... um... excuse me while I look up who won the war...

*disconnected*

Bed

Why does Adam sleep early so his mum and stepdad can fuck on his bed?

Nun

What's black, white, and red?

A nun that fell down an elevator shaft.

Toe

"Better lock 'em doors and turn the lights down low... Better turn 'em on, just stubbed my f***ing toe!"

Day

If you're having a bad day, just remember the Blobfish exists.

Bar

A redneck and a Black man walk into a bar and order a drink.

Clock

Why did Jack throw his alarm clock out the window?

Because it reminded him of Arnold Clock, the man who was accused of knife-raping his wife.

Bullying

Someone kills an emotionally weak person by hard words and bullying.

No one will suspect the killer was anyone who took part.

Name

"GWEN, can you help me? There's some person messing with me. There name is JADSA, something like that. Look for a joke named Jayden."

Gun

Three guys are escaping from North Korea through a tunnel.

The guards know that they are coming and will shoot them with paintball guns as a warning.

The guys show up and the guards shoot them.

The guys die because the guards used real guns.

Grandpa

I was at my grandpa's this weekend and I sent my online girlfriend nudes, and when I sent them, my grandpa's phone went off, so he went on his phone, then my girlfriend replied.