Morbid jokes

Brits don't exist. Mummies can't have kids.

What's the definition of disappointment?

Running into a wall with a boner, but it only hits your nose.

Yo mamma's so fat, she had to pull down her pants to get to her wallet!

What's the difference between a dump truck of dead babies and a Ferrari?

I don't own a Ferrari.

How many dead babies does it take to clean my refrigerator?.....it gotta be more than 4 because the fridge is still dirty.

I have something on my lip and I think I’m taller than you.

"Who am I?"

What do Nemo and my dad have in common?

They both can't be found.

So you wanna play like that, ayy? Well, Sydney didn't wanna play like that either, and that's why you got arrested.

I locked Terri Schiavo in the freezer.

Hey, I thought that's where you were supposed to put vegetables!

A guy walks up to me and says, "I wonder if the hookman is real?"

I reply saying, "Yeah, it's Asa Hutchinson, lol."

I hate when people leave their cars running, especially in the summer.

I'm like, "You got Tracy Latimer in there or something?"

So um uh I like people who like people who like people.

So apparently, Kurt Cobain's death was mind-blowing.

No one has my back like my dad.

Mufasa is proof that cats don't always land on their feet.

October 1, 2017 is when the Mandalay Bay became the Mandalay spray. Thank Steve for that.

I do not have enough information to complete this request. Can you please provide the joke?

Why can't orphans play baseball?

They don’t know where home is.

Katgod, can you get your girlfriend? She's messing with me, and I'm gonna hurt soon.

Dick.