Monster jokes
Papyrus: Sans, can you call Undyne for me and tell her that I found a human!
Sans: Sure bro, lemme just get on the Tele-bone.
Papyrus: Ssssaaaaannnnsss!!!!!!
Sans: Yea bro.
Papyrus: You know what? I will tell Undyne instead.
If Huggy and Kissy ever had a kid, they would have a good lunch. *evil laugh* 馃槇
Yo momma is so ugly, Slenderman runs from her.
It's also why he has no eyes.
What is a little zombie's favorite stuffed animal?
It's a deady bear.
"You may not rest, there are monsters nearby."
-Sun Tzu, The Art of War.
What sank the Titanic?
GODZILLA!
Yo mama so ugly that she turned Medusa to stone.
Do you know how a dragon is? You don't know who? It's dragging these 2-liter balls across your pathetic face and slamming it into a f*cking dumpster you regret.
Yo mama is so ugly, she is the reason Slenderman has no eyes.
Sans: Zzzzzzzz
Papyus: SANS WAKE UP!!
Sans: What is it dude?
Papyus: A human has fallen from the surface world!
Sans: And you gotta BONE to pick with 'em??
Papyus: Grrrrr....
Sans: Oh come on that was a real RIBTICKLER.
What cheese do monsters eat? Monsterella.
Therapist: So how depressed would you say you鈥檝e been feeling lately?
Me: I don鈥檛 care anymore if my foot hangs over the bed where a monster can get it.
Therapist [whispering]: Jesus, wow.
What does a lesbian vampire say to the other lesbian vampire?
"Same time next month?"
What's the difference between you and Frankenstein?
He is not ugly like you; plus, he has a wife.
Why do people think that monsters are scary? Cuz they are so stupid.
Two skeletons meet at the graveyard at noon.
"What the heck are you doing here?"
"I couldn't sleep."
Why can't vampires tell jokes right? All their jokes just SUCK.
What do you call a sneaky SCP-096?
The Spy Guy!
What's the difference between a wizard who raises the undead and a sexy vampire?
One is a necromancer and the other is a neck romancer.
Three strangers have opened a gay chat; but if one left the chat, the chat would be closed.
Stranger 3: How to turn a straight guy into a gay guy?
Stranger 1: You can't!
Stranger 2: You can.
Stranger 3: How?
Stranger 2: By using the same idea of the Russian experiment; like in a detention, put him in a closed room full of gay stuff, but the difference is that he can sleep, and he will have food for 30 days and a toilet, too.
Stranger 3: Great idea, but who can we try first?
Stranger 1: You all gays are evil monsters.
Stranger 2: I think the stranger 1 is just a straight spy. Let's try this experi-
(The chat has been closed by stranger 1)