Mom's jokes

Anonymous: This guy reads everyone's jokes, but why doesn't he answer his mom?

Mom, am I adopted?

What? No. "In head" No, dah, bitch.

Your mom and dad abandoned you because you're too ugly.

Q. Why did the boy fall off his bike?

A. His mom threw an oven at him.

Yo mama jokes are so old, like your mom.

Your mom is so old, she walked into an antique store and they kept her.

Your mom is so dumb, she called me asking for my phone #.

Your mom is so fat that she doesn't need WiFi because she is worldwide.

I remember you. You used to be an ash.

I would love to roast you more, but my mom said to not burn trash.

Your mom is so ugly her face would split in half when she sees you.

Your mom is a joke.

My mom ate my food, so I ate her pet hamster.

Your mom is so fat Santa Claus came down and said, "Ho ho holy shit!"

I was bullying a little kid for having a purple eye and said, "Where'd you get that? Your mom? Your dad?"

After that, everyone in my group was laughing at the kid. The next day I never saw him again.

Your mom is just like Rapunzel, but instead of letting down her hair, she lets everyone down! OHHHHH!

The police: Pull over!

The kid: Do you know who my dad is?

The police: What, your mom did not tell you?

A kid calls out for his mom one day while he is in the tub and says, "Mom come quick! I'm walking on water!"

And the mom runs in and says, "I knew evon whatent yo daddy! I ain't never slept with him a day my life!"

Little Johnny: Dad, why are you rubbing the horse's chest and butt?

Dad: I want to see if it's good enough to buy.

Little Johnny: I think Uncle Joe wants to buy Mom.

Your mom.

"Mom, these balloons are hard to blow."

"Son, stay out of the drawer."

It was my cousin's birthday and my mom said what should we get her? I said a rope.