Miss

Miss jokes

Emo

What do girl emos and boy emos have in common?

1. They both want to die.

2. They both cut to die faster.

3. They both listen to emo songs.

4. They like "I wanna die" song/"Miss wanna die."

Dad

"I miss you.

Being happy was never that hard without you..."

Someone's dad: You think he/she wants to join me? I didn't get the milk...

Student

Teacher to Student: You are supposed to be here at 9 am!

Student: Oh, did I miss anything?

Pork

Why does Kermit like Miss Piggy covered in honey? Because he likes sweet and sour pork.

Alphabet

"There are 20 letters in the alphabet, correct?"

"No, it's 26."

"Oh, I forgot, you are a cutie."

"You're missing one more."

"I'll give you the D later."

"....come to my office at 1pm ASAP."

Cricket

Some rules of childhood cricket:

1. Whose bat, his batting.

2. Mother called to go while fielding. Then the turn will not be missed.

3. If the Umpire's decision is not acceptable, the decision of the Spectator, Front Uncle, or Neighbor Aunt shall be final.

Battery

Why did Stephen Hawking die so soon?

Because his misses bought the wrong batteries.

Wine

Miss Stephen likes kids like she likes wine: 15 years and in isolation.

Rabbit

Little Johnny attends school regularly and often brings a box of sultanas as a gift to his favorite teacher.

One morning Little Johnny attends class without a box of sultanas.

The teacher enquires, why Johnny "where is my box of sultanas?"

Johnny replied, "Sorry, miss, my rabbit died."

Cycle

The cycle of Pionel Pessi:

- Ghosting👻

- Diving🐬

- Complaining to teammates😡

- Complaining to refs🤬

- Missing sitters🤦‍♂️

- Gets a lucky open net tapin⚽️

- Proceed to get 🐐 shouts

- Repeat🔁

People with REAL ball knowledge know he’s just an overrated tapin merchant 😭

Friend

My friend: You're so skinny, you never miss the elevator when it's closing. You just slip right through!😂

Me thinking it's a gift from God: 🕴️😎

Dick

What do you call a dick that doesn't fit in an asshole?

A misfit.

Woman

How can you tell if a Polish woman is on the rag? One of her socks is missing!

What danger does this put them in? Toxic Sock Syndrome!