Hello! I'm Taylor, and this is my life story with me and my ex girl. So when I was little, I met this girl. Her name was Leah. We were besties for a while until I turned 13. Then I asked if she wanted to date me. She said yes!
But one day, in the middle of school, she was talking to another man!!!!!!! AND THEY HUGGED AND KISSED EACH OTHER ON THE CHEEK!!!!!! Then, she told me she hated me. I was so upset!!!!!!!! Whatever you do, don't follow the ugly rat!!!!!!!!! <3
I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet.
Then I was even sadder, because that lucky guy didn't even *need* shoes!
I met Lebron James, and he was so bald at the time that I could count his hairs.
And that's 1 hair and maybe 2.
"I met a girl and she's 28."
"Now I'm the coolest guy in all of 8th grade."
- AJR
So, my friend and I were talking this time. I asked them what they would do if they ever met Rengoku. They said that they would probably like shake his hand or something, but I said I would lick his forehead. Wtf?
Everyone else seems to have met my dad. I only have the mugshots.
Three men met on a nude beach. Two of the three men were happy, but the third was sad.
The three men broke into a conversation. The topic eventually reached the men's jobs, and why they were at the beach.
"I'm a construction worker," said the first man. "All year long I toil in the sun in very heavy clothes, so this seemed like the perfect vacation for me. If I can relax and do it naked, that's a win-win."
"I'm an accountant," said the second man. "I just like how everyone here is dressed exactly the same."
The first two men turned to the third, sad man. "What do you do?" they asked.
"I'm a pickpocket," said the third man. "My doctor sent me here."
Met the emo kid today; he was pretty chill; he was just hanging out.
You know the Twin Towers employees were supposed to meet a good football team. Instead, they just met the Jets.
So my ex, who wouldn't leave me alone because she thought I was the best person in the world even though Will has a better haircut than me, but anyway, when we broke up she said I was the worst person she ever met, and I told her she looks like a cross between a beaver and a mole rat.
Then I told her she has the Wendy's logo haircut and then some other things I'm not gonna say. 2 years of bullshit, I was done.
Anyways, she cried lol.
I met a gay guy last night.
Man, was he a pain in the ass.
Have you met Bofa?
Bofa deez blind kids!
A woman prayed to be a mother everyday for many years until she crossed a road without looking and got hit by a woman driver and died.
When she met God, she asked Him, "How come you didn't answer my prayers?"
God replied, "I did. I kept sending men to rape you, but you kept on choosing to destroy my creations by having an abortion."
I'm jealous of the people who never met you.
What did the slaves say when they met their soon-to-be masters?
"Aaah, a ghost!"
I asked my dad what his previous job was. He said: "I was a post until I met your mother."
I’ll never forget the first time we met, but I’ll keep trying.
I met an amazing girl online. Smart, sexy... uninhibited.
Of course it turned out to be a 12 year old paraplegic boy... I have to admit... The sex was disappointing.
I had a huge crush on this girl when I was eight. One recess we met together on the playground, and she brought me to the corner of the playground. That was my first kiss, and from there it got serious. I told my parents a week later and they freaked out, called the police, and they arrested my crush. I miss Mrs. Johnson.
What is an orphan's least favorite show? “How I Met Your Mother.”
