Men wake up with a boner.
Women wake up yawning.
Coincidence?
Men Jokes
Did you hear about the German girl being raped by 10 men? She shouted, "nein, nein," so one of them left.
Two men are in a rainforest, and one of them is peeing. Suddenly, a snake jumps out of some bushes and bites the man’s penis. The other man says, “Oh my God, I will go to a doctor immediately!” He didn’t have enough time to load the man into the car, so he went straight to the hospital. The man told the doctor what happened, and the doctor said, “You will have to make an incision at the wound and suck the poison out.” The man went back to the other man and said, “There is no hope, you will die.”
What do you call the penises of gay men that are in wheelchairs?
Meals on wheels 😋😍🌭🌭🌭🌭🌭
Why are most firefighters men? Because they like to find hot places and leave them wet.
Why can’t Jesus be born in West Virginia?
Because they couldn’t find three wise men or a virgin.
Three drunk men get in a taxi. The driver knew they were drunk, so he started the car and turned it off. The first man gave him the money. The second man thanked him, but the third man slapped the driver. The driver, surprised that he noticed, asked why, and the third man replied with, "Why did you drive so fast?"
You can laugh at how men are stupid. But remember their favorite thing.
It starts with "M" and ends with "arriage".
If you guessed "Marriage" you're stupid. It's miscarriage and don't forget it. The joke never gets old to him. Just like the baby.
I like my couches like my women... Old, used, and big enough to fit 3 men.
Two men broke into a drugstore and stole all the Viagra. The police put out an alert to be on the lookout for the two hardened criminals.
What do physically handicapped gay men do after they are done belching? They wipe their mouths on their light blue handkerchiefs after they are done sucking cocks.
Why do four polish heteroflexable men like to suck on four of the cow's udders? Because a bull has only one.
Today I was asked to go out by 17 women. Well, I was in the women's bathroom. 💀
What do gay men like cocks?
🍦🍦🍦 they like the cream filling 😋
Men vacuum in the same way that they have sex.
They just put it in and make some noise for 3 minutes before they collapse on the couch and think that their wife should be really happy.
Who says “white men can't jump?” They certainly did when the twin towers were falling.
What do most 50-year-old men put inside their cars?
Children.
How are giants and strippers alike?
They both grind men's bones to make their bread.
Men: "I like dogs."
Women: "I like cats."
Chinese: "Food is food."
Did you ever receive an anonymous blowjob from another male under the handicapped stall inside the public men's restroom at a rest area and did you have an orgasm and was it the best orgasm that you ever had?
